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Living with Loneliness

Living with Loneliness

Feelings of loneliness occur when there is a mismatch between the amount of meaningful social connection we want and the amount we have. So while loneliness can be caused by isolation, it can also be felt when surrounded by people, and in friendships, family and intimate relationships. It is a personal feeling of social isolation

Loneliness can be really hard to manage and studies have shown it can lead to poorer physical and mental health. Physically, loneliness can cause low energy, poorer sleep, headaches, worse experience of physical pain and addiction. Mental health wise, it can cause anxiety, depression, poorer self esteem and thoughts of suicide. Often this can even lead to further isolation and feelings of loneliness for each person.

In Australia, 1 in 3 people report feeling lonely and socially isolated. This means that there is a chance many of us here on the forums experience loneliness, especially given that many of us have or care for those with lived experience of complex mental health concerns. It’s important for us to share that experience and find connection and support.

Questions for the community:

  1. What does loneliness look like for you?
  2. How does loneliness feel and how does it impact your wellbeing?
  3. Are the periods of the day or year when loneliness is harder to manage?
  4. What have you done to manage loneliness, do you have tips for others?

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We recognise that loneliness is experienced differently for everyone and we welcome all stories this space. Please remember to be safe and respectful of eachother, you can find the guidelines here. If you experience any distress whilst reading along with this discussion, please reach out to Lifeline 13 11 14 or the SANE Help Centre to speak to a counsellor.

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In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Loneliness

@tyme

Thank you so much for your reply. Thinking outside the box solves so many issues for me at times. It can take me a long time to come up with solutions, but then they are usually good ones.

I envy your ability to love being way out there and that you can love yourself for not being the 'norm'. In that regard, I am still trapped by conditioning. But maybe I don't need to be? My kids don't get it. Think I am losing them anyway, despite trying so hard to appear rational and conventional.

But yes, alone time is rejuvenating.

Wishing you a good day.

In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Loneliness

Hi there @Former-Member @Itsjustme1

I've had a similar time with having lots of friends in high school to having basically no one. Since I've had my mental illness people don't want to talk as much. I wish I could still have some of my old friends back. It's really hard sometimes. 😪 I've been lonely for years as well. I wish I could make new friends and keep them. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to have my say about something that it very hard to talk about sometimes.

In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Loneliness

Thanks for sharing.

I understand that feeling of not fitting in. I feel like people around me are not my species!

I am in a state of hiding from my family. I left home alone and nobody has called or messaged. It's like being off radar.

In response to: Re: Loneliness

Re: Loneliness

Just knowing that someone else feels the "invisibility cloak" too, reduces my sense of separation. Thanks for opening up. It means a lot to hear of your experiences.

In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

What does loneliness look like for you?

Not having any human interaction. Forgetting what do humans sound like. I sit in a room all by myself having no one to talk to 24/7. Becomes harder when I receive bad news and I know there is no one to support me.

How does loneliness feel and how does it impact your wellbeing?

It is a reminder that if something happens to me then nobody would notice let alone anyone would care.

Are the periods of the day or year when loneliness is harder to manage?

Every single day I wake up I regret it already knowing it is another day I have to spend alone

In response to: Re: Loneliness

Re: Loneliness

I feel everyone has an invisibility cloak. People who are lonely are those who have lost their strength to take it off anymore. Don't know about others, but for me the invisibility cloak is something I can't take it off myself anymore. I just need someone to help take it off by reaching out to me. Remind me that there is another person on this planet who remembered me.

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Hey @Someone_youknow I can hear how lonely you feel and it sounds like a really hard place to be. I'm going to send you an email to check in.

I'm wondering if it would be helpful to chat to one our SANE counsellors? The number is 1800 187 263 and there is also a webchat option. There is also the guided service, which would involve a peer worker or counsellor calling you regularly to check in and you can self refer. Would either of these options be helpful?

There is always someone here online so please check in with us as regularly as you like, there are a community of people here, who support each other every day, and you could be a part of that too.

Please take care 💝

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

I am not the best person when it comes to patience when I am anxious. I tried calling sane but after 25 mins of waiting time I gave up. There was no hint how long it can take so I just gave up. I tried the web chat but apparently the website says "chat is not available", but its fine I am used to bad luck even though the pain is breaking me

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Also
thank you for reaching out.

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Hey @Someone_youknow I'm sorry, there is a wait but our counsellors try their best to get to everyone. Have you tried any other crisis services? Here are the numbers

@Former-Member and I are around and can have a chat if you want to tell us what's happening or you can respond to the email if it's sensitive. 💝

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