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Fluttershy1Senior Contributor
I feel like my thoughts are out of control they are around SH, am safe but am struggling with the thoughts I have been so stressed the thoughts are just coming back. I don't want to have my addiction to SH again. I want to stay clean.
@Former-Member - am safe
In response to: Self harm
Unknown userMember
Hey there @Fluttershy1, just passing by to show some care and support for you tonight. Sorry to see you're still feel unsupported by your family. You must be so over it 
Thinking of you,
Sphinxly
In response to: Re: Self harm
Fluttershy1Senior Contributor
Thanks for the care & support @Former-Member,
it gets sooooo annoying
hi @Judi9877
In response to: Re: Self harm
Judi9877Senior Contributor
Hi @Fluttershy1 I'm just checking in to say I'm thinking about you and to let you know that you're not alone with how you are feeling.
I too have issues with my family and the issues regarding my mental illnesses to the point where I often don't like telling my sister and now more recently, my father, the ugly sides of what I experience. More often than not, I rarely mention my thoughts of self harm and my suicidal thoughts because they either can't handle the topic or my sister tries the 'this isn't my fault' game which I know off by heart and therefore don't bother telling her until the episode is well and truly over and done with. It's often better that way with my specific family dynamics I've learnt.
Families are special groups of people with whom we never get to choose who we want in that group. We are born into that unique group and unlike our friends who we can choose how we mix with them, families are different. They know all about us and I know from experience, this isn't necessarily a good thing. The reality is though, they do what they do because they care about us, odd as it may appear at times, and they never stop caring. I have only recently been back in contact with my father after a period of years and as much as we can argue, I actually missed not having him in my life when we weren't speaking as he often gave me great advice. He's in his 70s now and I'm glad that he's decided to open the lines of communication again because he's my only parent alive now. I lost my mum to cancer when I was nearly 25 and I'm 44 and I still miss her everyday so you can possibly see why I'm glad to have my father back in my life. Sure, he doesn't like the mental illlnesses but he accepts them as part of me like I accept that drinking is part of his life and we're cool with that.
I know that it hurts when your family says comments like you being worthless but I know from my own experience that they probably don't really mean this deep down. They could be having trouble in their lives that they may not want to tell you and may not be thinking properly when they make those comments. Sometimes it's best to forget those comments and tell yourself a different story to their story which is you are special and you definitely are worth living for. You've got people on the forums like myself who think you're amazing and funny and know that right now, things aren't perfect for you but tomorrow is also a brand new day with new experiences to be had and a new page in your life story to write. Go out and make that next page special and amazing!
Once again, take care forumite friend. You really are a special and strong person so keep on being your wonderful self!
Judi9877☺️🌸⭐️
In response to: Re: Self harm
Fluttershy1Senior Contributor
Hi @Judi9877 - didn't read it all but sounds like a lot.
Yeet @Peregrinefalcon 😜
In response to: Re: Self harm
Fluttershy1Senior Contributor
Hi @Judi9877 @Former-Member @BPDSurvivor @Peregrinefalcon @Shaz51 - just woke up. Slept in because I wasn't feeling well
In response to: Re: Self harm
Fluttershy1Senior Contributor
I'm beyond furious, this has to be a joke! My grandma is now asking me money so she can buy herself stuff when I still have all my appointments to pay for and my medication she doesn't care I give up, I'm leaving forums and all social media I'm in a bad mood and this isn't helping I feel like nobody cares. I wish I could be by myself. She makes me so angry. I shouldn't have to pay for anything of hers.
I give up I hate my life right now. I'm sick of life right now.
Am safe
@Judi9877 @Former-Member @BPDSurvivor @Peregrinefalcon @Bunniekins @pinemushroom
In response to: Re: Self harm
PeregrinefalconSenior Contributor
Hey @Fluttershy1
Sorry to hear that life is feeling rough today, things have been hard lately.
If you feel like a unplugging from social media is what you need right now, sometimes that can be a good idea for a little while and can give us some time to focus back on ourselves when we are feeling overwhelmed.
We are here to support you through this today
In response to: Re: Self harm
Fluttershy1Senior Contributor
@Peregrinefalcon - sometimes I feel like giving up I still have bills to pay, this isn't fair. I give up.
Am safe.
FAMILY JUST DONT CARE THEY JUST USE ME
In response to: Re: Self harm
Fluttershy1Senior Contributor
@Peregrinefalcon - I know what your going to do so go ahead and send me the check in email.
In response to: Re: Self harm
PeregrinefalconSenior Contributor
I trust you will be safe without a check-in email today @Fluttershy1 - you're stronger than you think!
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
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