My Mosaic

Wow @Bow re the eating! 🙂 👍Does someone record that somewhere on your notes? I'm thinking it would mean you get to go home sooner?

I hope today the dietician comes and you can get the fluids sorted... 💜

I’ve had a real shitty day.

seen the dietitian this morning and asked why the severe fluid restricts? She said I was suppose to be given 2 bottles of water every day- which never happened. She still won’t allow any additional fluids, no chai. Don’t want me to be filling up on fluids. Little does she know I’ve been drinking chais and have felt fine.
Im so frustrated at how slow this dietitian is taking everything. We decided to add a cheese sandwich to my lunch and that was going to be it. She could see I was not happy. I expressed my frustration. But said that it doesn’t look like I have much control over any of it. She said I do. In the end we decided to add a dessert cup to my dinner too. Not fast enough for me. I want to be out of here by the end of the week but she said no way.

i asked for some prn meds. I was so annoyed and upset.

i refused to be weighed.

they then decided to move me into a new room with 3 old men. I was not ok with this. I immediately started breaking down, panic attacks. How do I explain my trauma issues??? I started packing my bags. I was gonna leave.
thankfully the lovely old lady from church then arrived. She knew my story. I broke down even more with her and she went and spoke with the nurses. But I was far too distressed by everything that I pulled my ng tube out by myself. I was soon rolled out of there and they shuffled a couple of other beds around and put me in with another lady. i immediately felt a sigh of relief.
feel bad about how I behaved.
My dr wasnt very impressed with me.

Hey @Bow sounds like this was a pretty stressful situation and you reacted in a way that is understandable due to your circumstances. I'm glad they were about to move you and make you more comfortable.

I feel you have been wanting an admission and some help with your ED for quite some time and it sounds like you are finally getting that. You deserve support @Bow and I hope it will help in the long run. 💝

Sounds like a really rough day @Bow.

Your actions sound justified.

Since I don’t know much about ED’s, does introducing foods slowly help with a longer recovery?

Oh @Bow , sorry to hear about your awful day 😞

I'm glad you finally got moved in with a lady!

Are you getting the 2 bottles of water a day now?

Sending 💜 and wishes...

@Paperdaisy this isn’t really an eating disorder admission, yes I was admitted for my eating disorder, but it’s just to medically stabilise me and get me eating again. No one here knows a thing about eating disorders and thus there is no real ED support unfortunately. There needs to be more accessible eating disorder specific facilities.
like there is no support around meal times. If I don’t wanna eat I just don’t.
If I don’t eat what is on my meal plan I am suppose to be given a bolus (a nutritional suppliment) that rarely happens.
ideally toilets would be locked after meals for obvious reasons, this does not happen.
plus many other things.

I’m not sure @Captain24

i believe it’s to prevent the overwhelm of a massive tray of food. Helps your body get use to food again at a better pace. So I guess it does make sense for things to go slowly, but not this slow. I know my body and what I can manage, but that is very much being ignored.

In all my admissions for my ED, I’ve never been on fluid restrictions.

@NatureLover Yes I am glad to be in a room with another lady, although she is very loud. Insists on having all the phone conversations on speaker and she has an obnoxious opinion on everything.
I’m going to ask mum to bring in my headphones today.

And no, I haven’t been given my water for today. I asked for a chocolate milk from the tea lady this morning, she just ignored me. Then I went and got a cup of hot water to make me a chai.

The social worker came to visit me this morning. She was lovely. And turns out she has a lived experience of an ED. She didn’t talk much but it felt nice to know that she understood a little. There isn’t much she can actually do, but it was nice to talk about all my experience so far in this admission and to felt heard. She said that that is sometimes all she does. She will come back in a couple of days.

Fluid restrictions does sound strange @Bow. You would think that you need to keep your fluids up. I can imagine that a full plate of food would be overwhelming but as you say you know your body and have been living with this for a while. Would you be able to express this to the dietitian?

Im glad the social worker has lived experience. That means she understands. It sounds like it was a positive experience and it’s good to feel heard.

Hi @Bow,

Sorry to read you are in hospital again. I hope you are okay. The lady next to you sounds like she would make it a bit hard for you to get rest - the headphones are a good idea.

I'm glad that the social worker is lovely and think it is great that she is coming from a background of lived experience around ED. I really think sharing our stories and experience with people that actually have lived experience and not just textbook knowledge is so powerful. Although I understand the importance of textbook knowledge there is something comforting and bonding about sharing lived experience - particularly around difficult issues.

I really hope you are feeling a bit better soon.

Take care,

FloatingFeather