My Mosaic

Hi @Bow ...wow, a 2 hour psych appt, that would be tough 😮

I'm sending wishes for things to improve for you... 💜

my ED continues to wreak havoc in my life. I had DBT this morning and was then suppose to have an appointment with my pdoc, but she got called to court at the last minute. So I caught up with my case manager. We talked about where I’m at with my ED…. I was mostly honest in that I’m not eating much and struggling with fluids as well and as a result I’m often lightheaded…. Mostly just going from sitting to standing. I know my body is not coping but feel stuck in what to do. My CM was concerned and asked me to go see my gp, whom she called. I didn’t go and ignored the calls from my gp until she kept calling and messaging and I had no real choice but to return her call. She told me to go to the hospital and get my blood pressure checked, bloods checked and some fluids. I said ok. But didn’t manage to get myself there. I just don’t have it in me to deal with that tonight. I know it would be a long wait and they just don’t get it.
I’ll go get my bloods checked in the morning at my local pathology place before I head down south to pick my brother up.
I’m so frustrated with myself.

Hey @Bow ,

I hear how frustrating the situation feels for you at the moment, yet I also have to acknowledge the efforts you have made in accomplishing what you have today.

It's a tough road that I cannot even begin to imagine what it is like to walk on. Your strength and resilience is inspiring. I hope that things around you in your environment will fall in place so that your ED won't be so loud.

For now, know you are not alone.

Take care,

tyme

Just a whole lot of sad tonight. Sad at the realisation of where things are at. Trapped in this sadness. No way out. Can’t do anything to change it. Big dads 😢💔

Hey @Bow ,

It's true we cannot change the past which has brought us to the place we are at.

What is it that you can do right now to make even that slight difference now? That is, the present moment. It doesn't have to be lasting. But just needs to help us through even the next few minutes.

Hugs,

tyme

Hey @tyme what you said reminded me of what we talked about yesterday in DBT group… radical acceptance. Pretty big concept to get your head around and it feels really hard. Things are what they are. Can’t change them…… hmmmm

We were all up early here today. My daughter and I are heading south on a 6hr round road trip to pick my brother up. Haven’t seen him in a few years. He has been recovering from surgery to remove bowel cancer. Found out this week that he thankfully doesn’t have to have any further treatment. He is coming to stay with us to recover some more and spend time with us before going back home to tassie.

Hi @Bow , well done for being honest with your case manager, even though it resulted in the problem of being told to go to hospital...

I'm just so glad that you have all these professionals around you who really care about you...I know it sometimes doesn't seem enough, and that you would like an inpatient stay at an ED specialist unit which isn't available too, but I see it as really positive that you have all this support.

Sending 💜

I’m zonked. Nearly a 700km drive today. Ready to crawl into bed and pass out.

OMG @Bow ! 700km!! 😮

I've lost track of what's happening while I was absent...is this a holiday?