My Mosaic

Hey @Bow

Sorry it's so hard hon

Do whatever is best for you, just know here if you need.

@Bow

That’s a really hard place to be in. I really value you sharing your experiences but absolutely want you to prioritise whatever is going to help you get through the days. Like Snowie said, we’re here to listen if you want.

Hi @Wintersweet @Snowie thank you both.

not sure what to say sorry don’t have many words today. Due to see psychologist tomorrow. Anxious it will be a repeat of last week. The random SW came out yesterday it just felt frustrating- I cried which annoyed me.

how r u?

Hi @Bow , just sending you lots of love 🥰 and hoping you know how important you are to us.

awww @Eve7 thank you, that really warmed my heart. Thank you

awww @Eve7 thank you, that really warmed my heart. Thank you

awww @Eve7 thank you, that really warmed my heart. Thank you

@Bow

Hoping that after last week your psychologist will be quicker this week to recognise how hard words are and to meet you where you’re at. You’re seeing him Wednesday instead of Thursday this week?

It can be super frustrating when we’re annoyed and trying to communicate to someone that they’ve upset us and then end up in tears. Can feel pretty vulnerable too when that’s often the last thing we want to show. I’m really sorry you don’t have the SW who had been so good checking on you at the moment. Even if this new one does happen to be good it makes sense that you’d struggle with the change and not have the capacity/desire to trust her yet.

I think what Eve7 said was what I was most wanting to communicate! Sending you lots of love and hoping you know how important you are to us.

My day has been ok but I felt really unsettled when I woke up and have been super distracted through the day, which has led to me procrastinating and then feeling annoyed at myself. Normally I know what’s wrong and can articulate it. Today I have a general sense of the area of life where the issue is based on what increases the unsettledness but can’t work out what the issue is specifically.

Hi @Bow

Hoping the appt. with the psych goes well today and it can help even just a little.

Leaving some 💗💗 for you

why why why I can’t believe this is all happening all over again and all at the same bloody time. My psychologist is leaving. Yep. Again. Is this stuff even real? Beginning of October. I’m no where even attached to him, it’s been 5mths, but it’s starting all over again. Again. Sigh

when I checked in for my psych appointment I asked if my CM was available briefly for a chat afterwards. She was so touched base with her on a few things that have been happening….. Wanna know what else? ANOTHER new pdoc. Yep that’s right! This is ridiculous! How on earth am I suppose to get better/become more stable if I’m having to start all over with another pdoc every few months. My CM gave me the details for the patient liaison officer and really encouraged me to write a complaint, they are encouraging everyone and are themselves putting in complaints for each patient they see who has a response to the news. She said the people high up refuse to hire pdocs on a permanent basis cause they are too expensive, instead just keep hiring them on a 3 mths contract. That’s ridiculous.

so I got zero stability with support workers, have to change psychologist again and another new pdoc. I’m angry. Frustrated. Like why me? Why me again? I’m just not meant to have this stuff