My Mosaic

Hey @Jynx

yep very frustrating. She came today. After 1/2hr of her talking at me I asked her to leave. Was I rude?

@Bow I don't think it's rude to ask for someone to leave your space, I guess it just depends how you worded it/tone of voice and stuff. But that sounds more like a boundary to me than anything.

Yeah ok @Jynx i was dissociating and her being here was more distressing than helpful. I don’t think my tone was rude, I just asked if she could go please. She kept asking if I was ok and if anything she said had upset me., if she could still support me. I really couldn’t answer any of her questions. Just needed her to leave. And now I am scared that I’m gonna get in trouble from them.

how r u this chilly evening?

@Bow I think if you try to explain that you had dissociated, and that dissociation often results in basically going non-verbal, I doubt that you would 'get in trouble'. It's not rude or wrong to request space when you are trying to fight your way through a trauma trigger response. Maybe it's an opportunity to provide some information too, about what you may need in those moments when you're going into shut down?

Thankfully it's less chilly this evening than it was last night!! It got down to 3(!) degrees the other night, but we've had a cloud layer last day or so, so I no longer need my oodie robe and beanie haha.

Hope today has been okay for you? Any highlights?

Thanks for the thought @Jynx

@Bow I hope today has been ok for you 💗

Need to explain that to myself first I think @Jynx will reread that to make it hopefully stick w bit more. Then need to try convince myself that I could maybe possibly share that kinda information cause at the moment it don’t feel possible. Big walls immediately go up.

it was a fair bit cooler yesterday here too. Not so cold today just in a T-shirt, but my toes were cold! sun has been shining through the window. Yesterday I found one of them cat window hammocks at aldi. Set it up yesterday but groot was not keen. But today he has enjoyed it…. Until he got a bit too warm!
we had our house/pet sitter stop by this morning. Been a big point of stress cause no one was available where we usually find one. But our lovely neighbors put a call out at their church and found a lady there. She was nice. Has a cat and dog herself. So we can now relax a bit more now that that has been organized.
I did some more Lego and a page in my art journal.

what you been up to?

Hey @Snowie my friend. How are you doing today?

my days been so so. Same stuff different day.

Hey @Bow

I'm glad the house sitter worked out. One less thing to worry about and you can just enjoy yourself in Tas.

It's been so so here too. Cold so been an indoor day. Even dog didn't want to venture outside many times.

Managed to wash some sheets so at least I get to climb into a nice fresh bed! S probably won't notice but did all his too.

@Snowie of course hun, and there's hugs here for ya too if you want em 😉

⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

Fresh sheets are always so lush, hehe yay!

@Bow It's hard when the trust isn't there yet, I get it. I think the more you're able to share about your needs, your triggers and responses, etc., the more that trust can maybe start to build. Hopefully this person has at least some training in trauma-informed practice! But baby steps I think. Maybe writing down some of your thoughts/reflections could help, to potentially share what you find helpful and what you find overwhelming/triggering.

OMG window hammock that is too cute!! And pet sitter eh? Always a green flag knowing they have pets too!! You're off to Tassie? When? SO exciting!

What Lego are you working on?

I've been continuing my junk-hoard exodus haha. My car is full of bags and boxes to donate now 😅