Need to vent

No not far about 30 mins @BPDSurvivor

I know it's not far

I struggle with chsnges

this is a huge chsnge. But I'm very happy for my daughter. Her new partner is amazing. Such a hard worker caring supportive snd loves my granddaughter. And she thinks he's great too.
I know in a week or two I'll prob think "gee why was I so emotional" and I'll be ok.
Tonight Ayla said to me "Nonna I'm going to miss you" 😢😢 we are very close

I had to turn away after I told her I'd miss her too. Otherwise I would have cried

Awwww @BlueBay ,

That's so beautiful. It reminds me of my nieces and nephews. I miss them so much during 10 weeks of the school term. I only see them during the holidays. I spend so much time with them during the holidays, that I think I have withdrawal symptoms when i don't see them! Then I just phone them to read a book to them, or just to see how they are. That keeps me going.

Perhaps you can Skype or FaceTime Littke A?

BPDSurvivor

@BPDSurvivor

Oh yeah I think we'll be using face time quite a lot. She loves holding the phone snd loves chatting.
She's very excited as she'll have her own bedroom. A while ago she said to me "Nonna you have a bedroom, uncles have their bedrooms but I don't, can you buy me one"!!' I told her she's having a room when she moves. You should have seen her face. So happy 😀

@BlueBay ,

Adorably sweet and innocent.

Hi @BPDSurvivor @MDT @Shaz51 @Owlunar @saltandpepper @Emelia8 @Eve7 @Faith-and-Hope

and others reading

Day 1 without little A. She went to her dad's this morning picked her up from here.

Hubby and I went out for a walk and coffee down the beach, but a different part, not where we live. About 15 min drive away, also looked at area for houses.

Cleaned up the house, tidyed up the study, it now has a desk, a shelf and a section for little A's toys and books.

made a quick call to my mum to check on dad and it was a very quick call. nothing out of the ordinary. she is one weird, cold person.

now home enjoying the nice weather. just took the dog Jersey for a run at the oval.

Reg. work/jobs - i saw a pharmacy job yuesterday not far from home. i applied but now i have doubts that i am good enough. i self doubt a lot. i fear i am not worthy of a job. i keep thinking that i can't do it. my head is telling me things like 'if they call for an interview decline the offer'. i need to shut these voices down.

I need to sort out the pantry again and the laundry cupboard now that my daughter has moved out.

Hope everyone is having a nice day, thinking of yoiu all. xxxxoo

hello and hugs my sister @BlueBay

You never cease to amaze me, @BlueBay .

You've got such a love and strength in you too keep going - few would have that.

Im glad you could enjoy a coffee out on the beach. I'd love to go to a beach. Unfortunately, I don't have any beaches close to me here in Melb.

Have a great one!

BPDSurvivor

Hey @BPDSurvivor thanks for your reply. I walked down the beach again this morning with hubby and both sons decided to join us with the dog.
I'm very lucky I live 15 mins walk to a beautiful beach in Melbourne. It's a beautiful bay. Where all the tourists come on weekends snd summer!!!!
gee the house is very quiet. There's no noise from littke A. Oh I miss her. Miss hugs kisses chats play. 😢😢

tomorrow will be test day as I'll be home alone. I've decided I'll go for a morning walk then come home and clean out laundry cupboards. I need a plan to stay busy.
thanks @Shaz51 for hugs.
hi @MDT @Owlunar @saltandpepper

and others reading xxxxooo

@Emelia8 thinking of you lovely xxxxoo

xxxoooo

That sounds lovely, @BlueBay . It's wonderful you could go for a walk with your sons and the dog. I'd love to be able to do that!!!

It's good that you can make plans for tomorrow to keep you busy. Although you are 'alone', it doesn't mean you need to feel loneliness. Being alone and loneliness are two different things. I live alone and don't really have friends or family around me. I spend time with my nephew and nieces every 10 weeks or so during school holidays. However, I wouldn't often say I feel lonely. There are times I do, but it's not often.

Im waiting for my September holidays so I can see my parents and sister in NSW. It's been two years since I've seen them. COVID made it so hard to book a trip. Now that things are more steady, it looks like I can visit them in September - I'm totally looking forward to it! At least I can enjoy the beaches there more regularly!

So consider the difference between 'being alone' and 'loneliness'. You can be alone but NOT feel lonely. That's more the challenge! But looking at it, you're in a very good place to conquer the world tomorrow! 😘

Looking to hear from you tomorrow!

BPDSurvivor

Hey @BlueBay sounds like good day, I hope tomorrow will be too--even if it is a bit quieter than usual.

Is there anything you would like to do but normally wouldn't be able to with a little kid running around the place? There's a lot of stuff I like doing but can't around my boy--like work in the shed for example. Maybe there's an opportunity there to get back into or start a new hobby?