Need to vent

Sitting with you @BlueBay . I can see you are sitting with so much at the moment. I hope you will be able to take some time out at the moment and just enjoy your craft, reading etc.

In terms of your mum, it sounds like her loss - not yours. You’ve done your part. As for your dad, he’s of age. If he’s happy with how things are, he won’t seek to make changes no matter how hard you try. It’s sad, but true.

For the time being, rest up by dear @BlueBay .

Hugs, BPDSurvivor

Yes it’s all so sad but true @BPDSurvivor

thank you for the hugs

I needed a hug today

Xxxooo

Hugs from me too then @BlueBay 😊💓

Thanks @Emelia8

sending you a big hug too 🤗♥️

Thank you @BlueBay

Needed by me too.

Just heading off to oncologist appointment. 😵

Good luck @Emelia8 will be thinking of you xxx

@BlueBay , from what I’ve seen, your mum’s mothering (or lack of) has made you a better mother to your own children . It’s made you aware of the dangers out there whereby you could protect your children from.

If it weren’t for your experiences, you probably wouldn’t have the beautiful children and grandchild you have today.

Im not saying these things to pacify you. I’m saying it because I mean it.

As hard as it was to be diagnosed with BPD and have to live with it, it’s actually made me a more resilient and compassionate person. As if I’d be on forums such as these if I didn’t have BPD! Then, as if I’d meet amazing people like you and the entire SANE team! No joke - but no way!

My experiences have molded me to be who I am. My parents also never gave me the emotional support I needed. Til this day, I’ve never received a hug from them - do I blame them? No. They didn’t do it out of maliciousness. They didn’t know any better.

Perhaps your mum can see no other way, too? It sounds like she’s got her own issues and pains to deal with.

Hugs,

BPDSurvivor

Thanks @BPDSurvivor for your reply. I appreciate it. Xxxx
@Emelia8 how did you go at the oncologist?
hope you’re ok xxx

hi @Shaz51 @Owlunar

Sitting with you @BlueBay! I'm sorry you've had to deal with your abusive relationship with your Mum for so long. Sometimes people choose to be the way they are, sometimes they are who they are, no matter how many changes are made or what is done to help people. It seems like your mother is the way she is, or chooses to be. It's not nice of her to treat you this way. In saying that, you have your own family now. And they love you very much, from what you write about them. Sometimes it's good to take a big step back from the situation re: your mother. Sometimes it's good to just focus on you, who you are, what you want in your own life and that of your family. I hope you keep receiving support from them. It's good you're reaching out to the forums instead of doing something "bad", @BlueBay. You're coping under the circumstances the best way you know how, and I'm not just saying this either, love. I think you mean to be a good person, you're just so overwhelmed with everything at the moment. Hopefully things get better for you! You know you can reach out for help whenever you need it, and you know the forums are always here. So go ahead and write everything down however you feel comfortable to do so. Good on you girl! Please be strong and prove yourself right, as you always do. You deserve to be heard and you deserve to have the life and support you've always wanted. It's up to your mother to change herself for the better now, you've done what you can for her. Now give yourself a pat on the back hey! Am thinking of you!