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Changing meds

Changing meds

Hi. I battled MDD & acute anxiety nearly all of my adult life. I've been on numerous different SSRIs, SRNIs, antipsychotics, tried rTMS & ECT. Am addicted to a benzo for my anxiety.

I am in the process of swapping out from a SRNI to a MAOI and the wash out period is hell. I really don't think I'm going to make it. This is the darkest place I have ever been.
I have no family support, honestly no friends, not able to work & are completely isolated.

i don't feel my medical team actually care much anymore, they are overwhelmed by new clients because of covid.

i hardly sleep, but the last thing in my mind before I do, is how much I want to die. It's the first thought of the day when I wake up.

what if this new medication doesn't work either??

2972 replies

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In response to: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

How are you feeling about it all @Emelia8

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Tea and scones is always nice @Emelia8 @WIP

I've had so many jobs and one of them was serving tea and scones. (many years ago) Now I've isolated myself. I do remember it was nice socialising. Wish things were different.

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Devonshire tea @Former-Member ... nothing better than a proper pot of tea and a good old fashioned scone, jam and cream. 😄

How do I feel about the treatments Ive agreed to? Not sure yet. Maybe a little bulldozed. Although I flat out rejected some recommendations.

Em

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Here for you @Emelia8 💞

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Thanks @Former-Member ... And I for you.

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Thanks for the tea, scones and jam @Former-Member

I haven't had devonshire tea for so long - yum. How very thoughtful of you.

Hello @Emelia8

I was so overwhelmed this morning, I took extra of my tablets and was able to sleep for an hour and a half.

My Mum has just popped in for a little bit. I need to talk to her about how distressed I have been, and how terribly negative my thoughts have become. I know she won't have the answer, but she might just listen

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

I hope your mum will be a support to you @WIP

Mine just ignores all the secrets Not sure what to do here

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

My mum used to be supportive @Former-Member

These days, not so much. She just looks at me when I'm crying/wailing in emotional pain rocking back & forth. She doesn't know what to do.

What hurts the most is she doesn't even ask how I am anymore - she doesn't want to hear the answer.

I think that's why I've been so extra distressed recently, I can feel her lack of support. Without her, I truely do have nothing and there's no point.

It must be hard with your Mum ignorning the secrets

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

I know about the non support

961 - 970 of 2,972