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Changing meds

Changing meds

Hi. I battled MDD & acute anxiety nearly all of my adult life. I've been on numerous different SSRIs, SRNIs, antipsychotics, tried rTMS & ECT. Am addicted to a benzo for my anxiety.

I am in the process of swapping out from a SRNI to a MAOI and the wash out period is hell. I really don't think I'm going to make it. This is the darkest place I have ever been.
I have no family support, honestly no friends, not able to work & are completely isolated.

i don't feel my medical team actually care much anymore, they are overwhelmed by new clients because of covid.

i hardly sleep, but the last thing in my mind before I do, is how much I want to die. It's the first thought of the day when I wake up.

what if this new medication doesn't work either??

2972 replies

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In response to: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Sending you all bucket loads of ❣️❤️💞

Wishing I could help. Xxx

@WIP @Eve7

Hello also.anf.lobe to you too @BPDSurvivor @Snowie 💞💞

In response to: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Thanks @BPDSurvivor , I'm hoping for some glimpses of light soon too. I am losing hope though, it is difficult to maintain hope when you have treatment resistant depression.

There's many things that I struggle with @BPDSurvivor . Too many to list - the inconsistency of how I feel waking up each morning (it can be anxious, it can be teary, it can be flat as a tack) - my negative frame of mind, negative self talk - physical health issues - self confidence/esteem/belief, would be some of the top ones. I don't agree with you that my struggles are resistance against something. Sorry.
I can't control this illness at the moment, it is controlling me.

Anyway, hope you are enjoying being back in the office and I appreciate you checking in and thinking of me.

WIP x

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

@WIP , I'm sorry to hear things are so tough. I am thinking of you each and every day. I'm definitely hoping there will be some shift soon.

Hang in there. I'm with you in this.

BPDSurvivor

In response to: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Hi @BPDSurvivor the ECT (or anaesthetic or meds) makes me tired. I just woke up after a 4 hour nap.

I read somewhere that ECT can be effective after the 2nd treatment....well I’m waiting expectantly.

Hi @WIP sending loving hugs today and hoping today has had glimpses of hope.

💜🤗💜

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Hi @Eve7

I hope you feel good after your lovely afternoon nap. It's probably a combination of both the meds and anasetic making you sleepy.

Fingers crosses you start to notice a bit of an improvement after your 3rd session on Friday 🤞

Melbourne has had a lovely sunny day today. So Levi and I enjoyed a walk at the doggy park. I also had an Osteo appt this morning, so I have some relief from back/ribs/neck pain atm.

I hope you can sleep alright tonight after your nap today. I'm still having trouble sleeping - once that gets sorted out though, it should help me feel a little bit better.

Thinking of you,

WIP 🤗🤗

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

I heard something on the ABC today and thought of you and Levi @WIP

“Life is measured by a series of good dogs”.

Ben Harper

I am pleased your osteo gave you some relief today and I’m sure the walk at the foggy park on a sunny day helped as well.

We’ve just had a big storm with thunder, lightning and the rain which was quite spectacular.

My night meds do a good job of knocking me out but leave me rather “hungover”.

I’m looking forward to Friday’s ECT...haha

Thinking of you

💙🤗💙

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

“Life is measured by a series of good dogs”.

Ben Harper


I just love that @Eve7 . Thank you! 💕💕

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

I am so glad you like it @WIP I had to write it down so I wouldn’t forget to tell you.

🐶🐶🐶🐶🐶

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

That's so lovely and thoughtful of you @Eve7 - Thank you!! ❣️🐶🐶

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

@WIP 💞❣️❤️

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