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Something’s not right

Changing meds

WIPSenior Contributor

Changing meds

Hi. I battled MDD & acute anxiety nearly all of my adult life. I've been on numerous different SSRIs, SRNIs, antipsychotics, tried rTMS & ECT. Am addicted to a benzo for my anxiety.

I am in the process of swapping out from a SRNI to a MAOI and the wash out period is hell. I really don't think I'm going to make it. This is the darkest place I have ever been.
I have no family support, honestly no friends, not able to work & are completely isolated.

i don't feel my medical team actually care much anymore, they are overwhelmed by new clients because of covid.

i hardly sleep, but the last thing in my mind before I do, is how much I want to die. It's the first thought of the day when I wake up.

what if this new medication doesn't work either??

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In response to: Changing meds

WIPSenior Contributor

Re: Changing meds

Thank you lovely @Eve7 That's so thoughtful of you.

Been in tears all afternoon, this depression is just excruciating.

Hope you are ok.
🤗💞💙🦋

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Eve7Senior Contributor

Re: Changing meds

Oh I’m so sorry @WIP @that sounds awful for you.

I’ve had ect and psych today so it’s been busy but I’m okish.

Big hugs 💜🤗💜

In response to: Re: Changing meds

WIPSenior Contributor

Re: Changing meds

I'm glad you're day has gone ok @Eve7 @even though it's been so busy.

im in tears most days. Can't keep doing it for much longer. Don't want to.

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Eve7Senior Contributor

Re: Changing meds

Oh sweetie that’s not good @WIP I don’t suppose the lockdown is helping you much either.

I’m watching Hard Quiz on the ABC. Do you ever watch that? I really

like it but I find the contestants choices really odd sometimes.

Are you still doing the DBT course? Do you think it’s been helpful at all?

Sitting with you and Levi 💖

In response to: Re: Changing meds

WIPSenior Contributor

Re: Changing meds

Thanks @Eve7 Lockdown isn't helping at all.

I sometimes wat Hard Quiz, yes the topics can be interesting at time.

The DBT course has finished. It helped a bit, but not this underlying major depression I have. The constant sadness, worthless and hopelessness I feel from the moment my eyes open in the morning.

comvined with the physical illnesses I have, this isn't a life, it's just exisiting. And the thoughts in my head every day......

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Eve7Senior Contributor

Re: Changing meds

That makes me so sad @WIP

Its hard when our depression overrides everything else and just takes hold in the pit of our being. It is such a cruel horrible illness.

Walking this journey with you Day by day 💜💖💜

In response to: Re: Changing meds

WIPSenior Contributor

Re: Changing meds

I don't know how much lol never I can hold on @Eve7

Im all alone and feel just so so sad and hopeless.

there's no point to my life

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Eve7Senior Contributor

Re: Changing meds

I am sorry @WIP I see your life as being worthwhile. You are kind and considerate unlike your sister who has neither of those qualities.

I can’t talk as I often say those negative statements about myself but we are in this together.

Can you apply for a NDIS plan? If you had the right support worker it could make a huge difference in your life.

💜💜💜

In response to: Re: Changing meds

AnastasiaSenior Contributor

Re: Changing meds

@Eve7 @WIP @Emelia8 @Bow @BPDSurvivor all here

Hoping these provide some sunshine for each of you. Sending you love ❤️

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Eve7Senior Contributor

Re: Changing meds

Good morning @WIP sending hugs your way.

💜🤗💜🤗💜

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