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Something’s not right

Changing meds

Changing meds

Hi. I battled MDD & acute anxiety nearly all of my adult life. I've been on numerous different SSRIs, SRNIs, antipsychotics, tried rTMS & ECT. Am addicted to a benzo for my anxiety.

I am in the process of swapping out from a SRNI to a MAOI and the wash out period is hell. I really don't think I'm going to make it. This is the darkest place I have ever been.
I have no family support, honestly no friends, not able to work & are completely isolated.

i don't feel my medical team actually care much anymore, they are overwhelmed by new clients because of covid.

i hardly sleep, but the last thing in my mind before I do, is how much I want to die. It's the first thought of the day when I wake up.

what if this new medication doesn't work either??

2972 replies

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In response to: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

@WIP

In response to: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Popping in to give you a big squeezy hug and a ton of love @WIP 🙏❣️🌹💐🌸

You got this L x

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Hello sweet Em, you're awake late, are you ok?

@Emelia8 🌹

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Morning @Anastasia

I'm so sorry to wake up to the news that the situation is worse in NSW & seems to have spread to QLD also. I hope you and your boys are coping ok and aren't too anxious. It's a very unsettling time.

I got really crook over Saturday/Sunday night - upset tummy, running to the loo etc. I Hoped it was just the preservatives that were in the different YouFoodz that I had for dinner, but even Hydralite was going straight through me. Last night wasn't much better. I emailed the intake team y'day of the situation and rang the hospital this morning - only able to get thru to the switch, admissions lines were busy (as usual).

I'm not physically well enough to be admitted today. Plus I got my period overnight, which is always painful with clots.

I feel awful, and hope my bed can go to someone else this week, and my pdoc lets me be admitted next Monday or even later this week if I feel better. I pushed so hard to get admitted today and now this has happened....I feel so bad. Hardly slept.

I guess you are WFH for the foreseeable future?

You've got this lockdown. It becomes easier as the days go on 🦋💙💕

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Hi there @WIP . Really sorry that you have been so unwell, and that it means your hospital admission needs to be delayed. Very disappointing for you, but hopefully you get well soon and are able to get in later this week. I will take a leaf from @Anastasia playbook and talk to the universe to request that happens. 🙏😊

Yes @WIP , things are looking pretty bad here in NSW, and unfortunately its spread into other states as well. Not looking too good anywhere really. Perhaps we all need to relocate to Tassie?

Yes @Anastasia ... I was up late and through the night. Thanks for your post. Little Holly must have caught WIPs bug ... she was up half the night needing to go outside with vomiting and diarrhea. 5 times between 11.30pm and 3am. Thankfully it all settled after that, and she seems okay this morning. I dont know, perhaps she ate something outside that upset her tummy. I will need to watch her closely over the coming hours in case I need to take her to the vet.

I lost my favourite little budgie yesterday! 💔 He was always the friendliest and would come and sit on my arm when I went into the aviary and would eat from my hand. He would have been about 6-7 yo, and thats about as old as they live to. So I guess he just died of old age. Upsetting though, because he had seemed just fine and his usual cheerful little self the day before. But they are very good at disguising when they are unwell ... all a part of their survival instincts. Never let it be seen you are not well, because you will be targeted. Perhaps humans are the same? Or maybe they should be? Possibly thats why we put a false "I'm okay" mask on each day and insist to others that we are okay?

Anyway, I hope everyone here is as well as possible and that today ends up being a better day than you expected it to be @Eve7 @BPDSurvivor @outlander @Bow

Emelia 💕🤗

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Dear @Emelia8 So lovely to hear from you, although not all of your news is good. I'm very sorry to hear about your beautiful budgie. It's a shame you had no warning. It's an interesting question that you ask, maybe humans should be the same - I'm not sure?

Poor Miss Holly - I know how she feels. I hope she continues to improve today. You must be exhausted yourself this morning, tending to her during the night.

Im so glad the hospital were so understanding of sat/sun &'this morning how unwell ive been. Fingers crossed I can get in later this week or next Monday. I'm very disappointed.

I hope you have a decent day. 💞🤗💙

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Oh @WIP I'm so sorry 😔

@Emelia8 😔 sorry for your news too.

No words just love to you both and all here 💕🙏❣️

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

@WIP @Anastasia @Emelia8 @Eve7 💜💚💛

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

  1. Hello @outlander

How are you this evening?

Hello @Anastasia How are you? I keep missing you?

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Hello gorgeous @Eve7 , yes it has been a while. I'm ok. Bit pooped. How are you sweets?

Hello @outlander 💞

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