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Something’s not right

Changing meds

Changing meds

Hi. I battled MDD & acute anxiety nearly all of my adult life. I've been on numerous different SSRIs, SRNIs, antipsychotics, tried rTMS & ECT. Am addicted to a benzo for my anxiety.

I am in the process of swapping out from a SRNI to a MAOI and the wash out period is hell. I really don't think I'm going to make it. This is the darkest place I have ever been.
I have no family support, honestly no friends, not able to work & are completely isolated.

i don't feel my medical team actually care much anymore, they are overwhelmed by new clients because of covid.

i hardly sleep, but the last thing in my mind before I do, is how much I want to die. It's the first thought of the day when I wake up.

what if this new medication doesn't work either??

2972 replies

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In response to: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Hope you are ok @WIP ?

You are in my thoughts sweetheart ❤️

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Been thinking of you tonight @WIP as I watch your Carlton Blues play the Pies. Not a lot in it right now, though Pies are leading by a couple of goals. I would love to see Blues come back and win. There is still time. 🌷

@Anastasia ... Hope you're okay 🌸

Emelia 💞

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

The blues were just not good enough....again @Emelia8

I hope you have a gentle day ahead of you.

How's Holly? I haven't been to any other threads yet
💞💖

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Hi @WIP ... good to see you sweetie.

Yes it was disappointing. They were in it .. but just not quite there. They are showing a lot of promise though, and so much better than last year. They are scoring plenty of goals, but just not quite as good as their opposition it seems. Mind you, they did have a couple of tough matches to begin with. A feel that a few wins are not far away.

A couple of appointments in town for hubby today, not much else.

Holly is not too bad. Her ultrasound showed no tumours on her kidneys or liver, so thats a good thing. The blood tests to check for Cushings Disease have to be sent away for analysis, so no results back on that yet. The vet will ring and talk to me about the results when they come back. Possibly today or Monday, although with the floods, it could take a bit longer than usual for things to get through. Holly seems fine, but at the same time I sense that something just isnt right. She is unusually restless at night, cannot settle and is having breathing difficulties. Normally she will go to sleep and not stir until morning light. Now she is waking all the time and getting up and moving around as though she cannot get comfortable. I just dont know. I wish I knew how to fix her.

What sort of a day do you have ahead of you today? How did your group course go on Wednesday? Please give Levi a big cuddle from me. And sending a hug through to you also. And while I'm at it ... thinking of you @Anastasia as you slave away at work. Hope you are managing to get through all your work, and also that your Boy has settled into the hospital program and is doing well. Sending some love through to both of you.

Emelia 💞

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Yes, it's been Cartlon's style for the past few seasons to look extremely promising for the first 3/4 and then they run out of steam. I'm sure a win won't be too far away either. It would have been nice against our arch rivals, Collingwood @Emelia8

Im glad to have read that hubby's recent specialist appt went well over video. Hopefully the change in meds will be positive for him. Hope today's appointments go well also.

I can imagine how worried about Holly's health. As having them as our pets for so long, we become quite intuitive when things aren't 'just write' with them. At least she got the all clear on no tumours - that would have been just awful. I don't know much about Cuahinga disease so will research it. Can it be treated?

Courenjas finished, but I'm repeating it next month - April 7. I could have gone onto do the 6 months version of the course, but I don't feel ready, and more importantly I'd have to give up my current psychologist - and that was a deal breaker. She's the head of the DBT centre, so I'm in safe hands.

By redoing the course, I hope to absorb more

of the material - after the bump on my head and having a bruised forehead bone, this is the first week I'm not suffering bad headaches. So hopefully round 2 of the course will be better (even though the content is very triggering).

Im seeing my new psychiatrist next week

for my 2md visit.. So already getting anxious about that, as I know what type of handover my previous pdoc would have provided. But I must try not to worry until closer to the time, as it's just wasted energy otherwise.💞💖💖💞

Hi to @Anastasia Thinking of you lots and hoping you are keeping your head above water. Just keep swimming - as I'm sure you are 💞💖💖💞

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Just at an appointment and scolling through found this. I love it and wanted to share it with you...

@WIP @Emelia8 @Bow @Eve7 and all following 🙏💞

Sending you all love 💗

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Some love back to you @Anastasia

💖💜💖

In response to: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

@WIP

I hope these bring a smile to your face. Love you lots L x

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

They are beautiful, thank you @Anastasia

I've tried SCBS & LL today - no help. I don't know what to do anymore.

I spend all day crying and I can't think straight.

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Oh dear @WIP I am so sorry. Have you tried Sane chat? You can even book in a call back. Let me know how you go. In the Mean time I can be here for a little while x

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