Changing meds

Sitting with you @WIP and understanding your pain which is so unfair.

My pdoc says it’s not untreatable, we just have to find the right combination of drugs and other therapies.

I’ll be positive for you today while it’s too hard. I want to wrap you in a safety blanket of love.

💖💖💖💖🏏

I love you too @Anastasia

Do what you need to do - I'll catch you later.

It is good Mum is coming over, she can take Levi for a much needed walk.'don't get me wrong, I love my Mum unconditionally, but at times I find her company challenging. She's the only contact I have outside ky medical team and I need more stimulating conversation than with a 74 yo, who continually repeats herself and talks about her friends health issues etc

i found a women's friendship group on Facebook @WIP I haven't made any contact with them yet. I'm not quite ready for that. Zero energy lately. Plus Christmas time. Ugh ugh ugh!😩😢

Anyway, they are all ages. The ones my age regularly do things. Eg lunch, dinner, coffee, games nights, walks, plus many other things. I'm hoping to feel like meeting up with them in the new year.
Do you have Facebook? Maybe have a search on there for women's friendship groups, locally.
I joined to keep an eye out on what they do and it gives me slight hope.
Families can be very toxic, that's for sure. It was extremely difficult for me to break ALL ties. Sorry you're hurting so much regarding your sister. I understand. It does hurt. Hugs 🤗

Thats okay @Anastasia ... I knew you would want to know that @WIP needed some company. Hope your Boy is okay.

@WIP ...

"Emelia, you say these mornings aren't sustainable and won't be there forever, better days are ahead. When? When will it be my turn for a little

positive change?!! I try so hard, but this negative mind has control over me and I am so, so lonely."

I dont know when that day will be. None of us do. But I am confident that one day you will wake up and things just wont seem quite so dark. It may be a subtle thing and you may not even notice initially.

You have tried so many things to help yourself, tried so many therapies. Seemingly with little positive effect. Yes ... there is no doubt you are well and truly overdue for a more positive outcome for all your efforts. It will come. Keep fighting, as I know you can fight long and hard. You have shown that time after time. Its not at all surprising that you sometimes fall into a negative mindset. You would not be human if that didnt occur. But I also know you can pull yourself back up off the floor and keep going.

I am here for you, as are your other loyal friends here. @Eve7 @Former-Member @Anastasia @BPDSurvivor . We all feel for you so much. How I wish I could say or do something that would be more helpful than the mere offer to sit with you and share a cuppa. If I could do more ... I would ... without hesitation. At least your Mum is there for you ... what a special Mum she must be. You are so lucky to have her ... but she is even more lucky to have you. Dont let her down @WIP ... fight for her, as well as for yourself and your beautiful Levi. Fight for your much loved nephew, who clearly loves you just as much as you do him.

Emelia 💞

Hi @Former-Member ... sorry to hear you are taking care of an unwell person since around Christmas time. I'm thinking this may be your D. I too hope she will pick up today. Sending you much love and strength. Thanks for the pretty flower pic too.

Emelia 💕🤗

Thank you dear @Eve7

I agree, I just haven't found the right combination of meds and therapy.
Unfortunatley, my pdoc isn't very helpful &

only concentrating on reducing my b3nzo use -

even when I tell him I SI thoughts all the time.

My new psychologist seems more supportive &'I hope she'll help me in the new year.

Thank you for the safety feeling blanket of love. I'm in such need of a hug. ❤️💖❤️💖❤️💖

Thanks for your understanding too.

Thanks @Emelia8 Yes, unfortunately it's d. Such a concern. 😢 She was in ambulance to emergency recently.

Did you have success washing your hair in the sink? I hope so. I have 2 showers a day normally. Recently I had to wash my hair in the sink and sponge bath for for quite a while, while tradie fixed the shower. I think I mentioned to you how he didn't turn up etc. shower is finally useable. It was a challenging time. I hope sponge bathing will help you feel more comfortable. It is refreshing when there's no alternative. 💜

Oh @Emelia8

Thank you for your such supportive and beautiful words - you've bought on the tears again. (In a different way than earlier).

You are so kind and loving, I just want to give you a big hug of appreciation - thank you! 🤗🌸🤗

Thanks for the tip @Former-Member

I'll check out women's groups on FB.

There's another site - Meet Up, that has different groups. I've had my eye on that for a bit

Its just all scary.

❤️❣️❤️❣️

Yes, it does seem scary at the moment @WIP For me too. Just not feeling up to it just yet. The day will come. I looked at meetup, but didn't find anything suitable. Just early morning walks. I'm not a morning person and it's too hot for walking in summer. Walking is a winter thing for me. Anyway. I hope you have success. Just a small step a day is helpful.
🥰