Changing meds

Would love another cuppa. Thanks @Emelia8

I have scones here for anyone who'd like one.
@WIP @Eve7 @Anastasia

💖💞

Sorry you're struggling this morning, WIP 🤗

@WIP ,

I was in a catch-up DBT group the other day, and someone said something that really struck a cord with me.

They said that they often hear therapists say some clients have 'treatment-resistent' depression, BPD etc. In reality, it's just that the client has never found the right treatment or the 'thing' that works.

I found this very true. They also went on to say that when treatment doesn't prove effective, it is NOT the client's fault.

I know there's an answer for you out there somewhere @WIP . Don't give up. Just hold on.

BPDSurvivor

Thank you lovely @Emelia8 & @BPDSurvivor for being here with me. It means a lot. I need some help atm.

I am really struggling this morning and feel even worse I couldn't sustain a conversation with my nephew. He knows I'm not well and worries about me, but I just don't want him to think he can't help make me feel a bit better. He wrote that on my Christmas card 'when I com to Melbourne in January, hopefully I can help you feel a bit better'. Now with the Sydney borders shut, looks like I won't be seeing him anyway.

I feel worse I couldn't keep talking to him.

My sister hasn't called back to see if I'm alright - another kick in the guts from her.

Emelia, you say these mornings aren't sustainable and won't be there forever, better days are ahead. When? When will it be my turn for a little

positive change?!! I try so hard, but this negative mind has control over me and I am so, so lonely.

Thank you @Former-Member 💖 You're so thoughtful.

I’d love tea and scones @Former-Member thanks.

Here with you @WIP I am so sad It’s like this again for you. I know how hard it is but we are with you every day and only a tag away.

I am going out with S1 and kids to see Bluey and Bingo. Hoping I don’t spoil their day.

Hi @BPDSurvivor @BPDSurvivor @Anastasia

💙💙💙

I hope you all have a nice time @Eve7 💞

Still here @WIP

I don't know any magic answers, sorry. I do know I've been in terrible dark places for many years. Now I do have some good days. I don't know what in particular helped me. I know it's hard and seems impossible at times, but it does gradually start to get better. As @BPDSurvivor mentioned. I think I'm treatment resistant. Hi @BPDSurvivor 👋🥰

@BPDSurvivor Yes, I'm diagnosed with treatment resistant major depression. It took me a really long time to get used to that diagnosis - but I am not my diagnosis! Treatment resistant can mean the 2 or more different types of treatments haven't been successful, and that's accurate for me. I've lost count of the med types I've been on - & then of course there was TMS & ECT - both short term success.

I haven't found what works for me yet and I keep searching. This entire year has been a time

of trialling new meds and working with various psychologists. I even tried finding a new psychiatrist. Luckily, I have found a DBT focused psychologist last month, who I think I'll work well with. We are aiming for weekly meetings (but I've had to cancel a couple because I've been in an

emotional crisis state) and referred me for a 12 week DBT course, 1/2 days.

Im trying to hold on @BPDSurvivor .im trying new therapy's etc. my head is just wired so negatively and convinced I'm never going to get better. I'm a shadow of who I used to be. Not capable anymore, no self esteem or worth, no irl support and I'm so, so lonely - but shit scared off putting myself out there.

Im trying to hold on, but days like today it's really challenging.

Thank U xx

Yes please @Emelia8

I’m here with you @WIP . I’ll be sitting quietly today minding the bags and $$.

MH nurse just came and said I could go out with family. 👍

I hope you have a nice time out with the grandkids @Eve7 & enjoy their company.

The majority of my days are dark @Former-Member , very few decent days. I tell my psychiatrist this, he doesn't seem to care. I've told my new psychologist and she understands that life can't be sustainable this way. It's just really, really paralysing when I wake up in tears and can't control them. I'm miserable and cannot see a future. I can just see how many bloody long hours it is to the end of the day and I can take meds to

get a little bit of sleep.

Thanka for listening @Former-Member I really appreciate it.

I understand what you're going through @WIP Sorry it's so tough. I've been in a very dark place lately. Today I'm feeling very slightly better.
I can't take daily medication. Only drink when I'm really not coping, but it just makes me feel worse for days after.
Let the tears come. They are healing.
Sorry the phone call didn't go well. Do you think writing a letter to your nephew might help and maybe send a small present. Just a thought. 🌺🌷🌸