I am struggling at the moment

..may sound dumb, but can you eat @Former-Member ? is there food in the house? I remember visiting f friend after her being in bed for days ..a pasty was the standard request .. Hope all goes well, I've stayed out of it, but plenty there and thinking of you

Hi @Former-Member

Thanks for telling me that BDP is Borderline Personality Disorder - not that I am much wiser - I will have to look that up.

But at least I know it's not BiPolar - which I do know a bit about

I was here yesterday for a fair while but today I went out with my dd and then had a bad headache - possibly the wind - so I am here for a while tonight but I want to watch something on TV

That's Dr Phil talking to JonBenet's brother - it has occupied my mind for a few weeks now - how terrible the court of public opinion is - however I am interested in seeing how this pans out

About our emotions - well - well - um - they are what they are but yes - we do need to develop some self-control. I have looked a bit about personality disorders on the internet - and I sorta think it is really hard not to have some kind of personality disorder - I will have to do some hard work thinking

I am not joking when I say I think I have "Hard to get out unless I have an Appointment Disorder" - I remember looking this up on the internet and wondering - is there an end to this

Decadian

@Former-Member

I think there are many similarities in our personalities and adaptions in childhood ... I have more passivity in me than I realised.. which would manifest similarly to DPD... of course there'll be differences too.

It is good you could run your interaction with your son by your therapist.

Adolescence is such a tricky time .. NOW there is a lot more awareness about the career & life choices, hormones and blooming sexuality issues. I know you know all that.

Society often does an overcorrect. We need to look after our active parents .. mums & dudes.

I was a bit unsure though when you mentioned your health team didnt want you relaxing at home ...

I can now do the whirlwind, the calm eye of the storm and everything in between. Your time will come.

Take care... .

Hi @Faith-and-Hope

What a struggle all of this has been for you and D3 - it has been exhausting for both of you

So I am not sure at the stage if it is all over yet - I seem to remember you had a bit of confusion about her graduation and an over-seas trip - alas - can there be an end to this co-incidences?

But I have been thinking about D3 - and all she has been through this year - I am sure once she has over-come her own self-doubt and whatever else bothers her that makes or has made going to school so hard that in the future she will know that it needs her co-operation if she really wants to achieve

So easy to say - so hard to endure

Still thinking of both of you

Decadian

Thanks @Former-Member for your really considered response. I guess I keep battling and wanting to be further ahead than I am. I've finally acknowledged that for much of the time I'm not well. I have a psychiatrist who I see every 6weeks but he doesn't know me at all and we struggle to connect. I have no other options as he is free through the mental health team. I have an appointment tomorrow with him to admit me to hospital if he will. I'm not sure how it will go. They are trying to find me a bulk billing psychiatrist but this will take some time especially as I want to see a female one.

I think I'm feeling a bit like @utopia described, I'm feeling a bit of relief that I made the decision. A small weight has lifted for now but I will be really anxious tomorrow when I have my appointment. I am very lucky to have my therapist, she is a very kind and caring person. I'm sure you would like her too.

Im sorry it is taking me a while to respond at times. I'm finding I change mood so quickly and my energy keeps fluctuating so I'm really inconsistent.

I hope you sleep well and achieve your goals for tomorrow. I know you'll get there too. And I wanted to say it's lovely seeing you post more around the forums too💜😊🤗💐

Hi @Decadian,

it's good to see you around again. The BPD fact sheet on this website (Sane) is one of the better ones. Their other info is good too. It was what my family were given when I first got diagnosed. You are right, everyone meets the criteria for some personality disorder. I particularly like yours though. I think I have that too 'hard to get out unless I have an appointment disorder' (HTGOUIHAAD) 😆

Take care 💜😊🤗💐

@Appleblossom my mental health team want me to stay home I think and have home visits from a social worker, avoid the cost of a hospital visit. That won't work though, half the reason for me going is to have a break from the stresses there and get the help I need. 💜😊🤗💐

@TAB Thanks we have food, I just am not eating much, just an occasional all piece of chocolate :face_with_rolling_eyes:😱

thanks for checking in though. I appreciate it, it's really thoughtful. I hope your getting through better and frenemy is chilling down a bit 💜😊🤗💐

Your welcome @Former-Member !!!

I think you are being too hard on yourself and I think you are doing really well. I kinda wish I was better too and that I should be further ahead too but it is what it is.

Another way to see a bulk billing psychiatrist- you could ring around and ask at a private clinics which Drs bulk bill or ask your GP to ask a female psych if she is willing to bulk bill you.

Some things that have helped me in the past

• Go back to basics (self care)
• Write up a to do list
• Prioritise what need to be done
• Do something nice for yourself
• Set yourself a goal

Your not alone is connecting with a health professional- how long have you know him for. Do you get any relief from seeing him?

At the moment I he doesn't help at all @Former-Member but I have to see him to get any help from the mental health team. My mindfulness classes depend on it as does access to other programs and the short stay at hospital. My GP has tried to find a new psychiatrist as have the mental health team. It is hard to get one here that bulk bills. If they can find me a new one they have promised I'll still have access to the programs I do now.

And yes the basics, my nemesis when I'm down and out. That is the highest thing on my agenda again. If I get to go to hospital I think it will help me recharge and get back to the basics. I've been self sabotaging so much lately 😔😱. Thanks for caring. It is an amazing group of kind caring people here and you are definately one 💜😊🤗💐