Feeling Gutted and agitated

Hi @Appleblossom

What!!!! It's going rain again today!!!! When I got up for my medication it was sunny - I thought - I didn't have to risk getting caught in the storm I could see coming and got the taxi tor drop me a the corner shops so I could get the medication I had left there for safety while I was away. Now I am glad I did

Sheesh it's cold - well - I suppose we can have a group hug in a group puddle and if we cry - well - we are already damp up to our knees

I've lived in Melbourne all my life and do not remember so much rain - but my mother told me we had a long autumn flush the year my sister was born - and we had one this year - and after my sister was born it started to rain and rained all winter - the skies must have been holding all the rain up there waiting for this winter

Enough ranting about the weather - my dd works in High End Retail - and the customers - whoops - clients always talk about the weather - not I try hard not to - after all - we all know

But if I don't mention the weather - other people do - I guess after this or during - the rain this winter we have to express our misery

Enough on the weather - but I bet I will hear it from someone else before long

Decadian - cold and rather low atm

Yes @Faith-and-Hope

I have noticed - on the rare moments were get some sun - things are green and growing fast - including the weeds

I know I will come alive soon - I watch for signs of spring - like the rising and setting times of the sun which are small to being with - but I do notice - and the green bulb-plants poking up tthrough the earth - and the buds beginning to swell up on the trees - and yes - the planets

Humour keeps me alive - I can see the funny side of everything - or nearly everything - I was a stand-up comic in the past - I started at my own church at the time when my children were young - and found I needed an audience that was appreciative - I would be invited to have a go at other church concerts and there were times when I would give up minutes after I walked onto the stage - other times I would catch the eye of two or three people and play just to them and I would get the laughs

I have heard being a stand up comic is one of the hardest things around - but I need an audience of one - and I am fine - on-line works well

I am glad you got D3 off to school yesterday even if you were up all night with her - I know this is a difficult situation with her having a complex challenge in her early years at school and not just a lack of wanting to be there - I really feel for her and for you - I could hardly wait to get to school

Love this story - I got back at my mother without even trying. On my first day at school she packed me a play lunch that would have lasted all day but I forgot to take it out at playtime - and when all the kids going home for lunch went out - I stay in the classroom with my play lunch - but my mother was at the door insisting I went home - so I went home for lunch for the next 7 years of my life.

I like that memory

Decadian

Dear Appleblossom,

I would really like to connect with you through these forums. You are the only person who has replied to my post at the moment.

I feel so scared and alone, are we able to chat one on one on this forum and I would really like to connect with you as our experiences are very similar. If you could give me some guidance about using these forums that would be great too. I would really appreciate it and hope to hear back from you soon.

I haven't found your post yet @awa09804

I do know you posted something - and I looked - but sometimes it is hard to find something that is a couple of pages back

If you post something again - or copy what you did post - I am sure you will get a response - we are not heartless here - in fact - quite the opposite

And I know it is disappointing when people don't reply - it happens from time to time

Decadian

Dear Decadian,

Please see my post below in reply to Faith and Hope, it is a reply to both of you really.

I would really like to connect with you all. Any help and advice would be great.

Have you guys ever joined any depression/anxiety and support groups in the community, where you meet people face to face and if they are any good.

I will be back online again in a few hours. Trying to relax and will have to take some more medication as well. Do you guys ever have times like this when you feel like your world is coming apart? It would be great to hear back from you and faith and hope soon. Thanks.

Hey @awa09804 🌷

I'm heading out for most of the rest of the day, but I will be back later to chat. If you keep posting, I will pick up your replies on my phone, even if I can't respond right away.

You will find others jump on to talk to you too ....

I am guessing one of the moderators will drop in and chat to you too, because they are very good at letting us know about other support services available to you, as well as keeping up online friendships on the forums here.

I don't take meds, cos my issues are family based and circumstantial, but I can relate to how you are feeling, an I can tell you there are a lot of other people here who have the same sort of lived experiences story you are struggling with at the moment .... they will be able to give you some good advice, although we can't go into much detail about medications as such .... and tonnes of empathy.

You are not on your own with this. Stay connected ... 😏

Back later ....

Hi @awa09804

I took the afternoon off - I don't have medication for depression or anything like that - I am dealing with memories - and for that we can't take anything

And atm I am feeling totally fed up with the on-going Melbourne weather so I took myself off to bed this afternoon and took medication for my back pain and went to sleep and woke up feeling sure winter is a waste of time

So I haven't found your post yet - but I have put my dinner on and I am going to look through the thread and go further back and see if I can find what you wrote

It's so easy to miss someone new in the forum - the posts new people put in can be missed very easily but the moderators do pick this up

I will be watching to see when you come back on line - depending whether or not I take myself back to bed after dinner but I have seen you there and I will be on the look out

Decadian

@awa09804

I am happy to talk on line ... about things we have in common ... or that are different ... about life

...sometimes I disappear suddenly or for a few days ... as I have to get things done... or have a long lie down.

I spent the first 40 years of my life quite isolated ... apart from work, study, family, and medical stuff.

I take the role of community guide seriously, and have been thrilled to see the growth of the forum and the diversity of voices and attributes.

I couldnt find your original post.

I may not read everything immediately but I do try and answer when tagged ... tho it may be afew days before it comes to my attention.

Groups are diverse ... I went to an Adavic group half a dozen times but it wasnt right or really able to support me ... but it might work for others ... you have to try what is in your area at the moment ... and decide for yourself.

Groups are a sum total of the individuals in the group ... so a lot depends on the members and the leadership.

Take care

Apple

@Decadian I used to hate weather talk ... ... but appreciated their and your dry humour.

Then I would indulge friendly polite weather talk ... just to practise socialising ...about 10 years ago I decided the climate change issue was becoming more mainstream ... spoke about it with parents students etc ... just chat .. not rant ...

Thank you all for your support

Apple