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Something’s not right

Depressed

Alex32reddenSenior Contributor02 May 2020, 5:11 pm AEST

Depressed

Hi. My name is Alex. I am very deppressed and feel lonely all the time. I'm 25 in a few days and I've never had a girlfriend. I've been on dating apps for a long time but I haven't really had any dates. I feel very unattractive all the time. Sometimes I just pray I die of a heart attack or something. I really don't want to live anymore. Nothing is interesting. I have no motivation to do even small things. I think everybody knows I'm a loat cause. Nothing helps. I keep going up doses on my antidepressant but it's not helping. I'm hoping to try transcranial magnetic stimulation therapy soon. It will probably use up all my savings. I know that I crave physical touch. I'm not sure how normal that is. Every day someone says something that makes me feel more deppressed. I actually had a coping mechanism but my brother cut that off. I've also felt very stigmatized. I'm thinking of sueing people that stigmatized me. At least it will feel like I'm standing up for myself. But I'm worried the whole process will make more depressed. I'm just not sure how much longer i can go in this world. I have been seeing therapists but i honestly think they just make me feel worse

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In response to: Depressed

Alex32reddenSenior Contributor03 May 2020, 8:48 pm AEST

Re: Depressed

Ive told you. Nothing is interesting. Nothing at all. Every thing is boring. Even tv is very boring now. I don't understand how i used ro even be interested in anything

In response to: Depressed

Unknown userMember03 May 2020, 8:50 pm AEST

Re: Depressed

Hello @Alex32redden

I am very concerned about what you post Alex as it sounds like you are not safe.Whatt can you do to keep yourself safe this evening?

I assure you that if you phone the Suicide Call Back service you will be treated with respect and you will get help 1300 659 467

Please put your own needs first,

Whitehawk

In response to: Re: Depressed

Zoe7Senior Contributor03 May 2020, 8:52 pm AEST

Re: Depressed

What things did you used to be interested in? Maybe we can start there @Alex32redden

In response to: Re: Depressed

Alex32reddenSenior Contributor03 May 2020, 8:58 pm AEST

Re: Depressed

I used to like sport. Fantasy books and euro games but they definitely are not interesting now. Im watching sport now and its very boring

In response to: Re: Depressed

Zoe7Senior Contributor03 May 2020, 9:00 pm AEST

Re: Depressed

I love my sport and it is such an unusual time not to have any on @Alex32redden Footbal (AFL, NRL, soccer) and tennis are my main sports. Have you played sport in the past?

In response to: Re: Depressed

Alex32reddenSenior Contributor03 May 2020, 9:06 pm AEST

Re: Depressed

I play basketball. I used to play foty but i was too skinny. I think being skinny has screwed me over in many areas of thid world

In response to: Re: Depressed

Zoe7Senior Contributor03 May 2020, 9:09 pm AEST

Re: Depressed

I used to play basketball when I was younger but lost interest in it over time. I did love footy but being a girl there was no avenue 20-30 years ago to play other than some exhibition matches - how I would love to be young again now to be able to play.

There is nothing wrong with being skinny @Alex32redden - just makes you harder to tackle or to stop I reckon lol

In response to: Depressed

TaySenior Contributor03 May 2020, 10:04 pm AEST

Re: Depressed

I have a 22 year old son who feels exactly like you. He has an ID , he's never had a girlfriend, he has friends but since the isolation he can't see anyone. I'm his mum and I love him so much but because of the current restrictions I can't give him a hug.

where are your parents? You say you hate this country - why? Go cuddle your mum or dad - you're too young to be feeling this way.

ring 000 please and tell them exactly how you're feeling

In response to: Depressed

NatureLoverSenior Contributor04 May 2020, 8:18 am AEST

Re: Depressed

@Alex32redden I'm sorry you're still in an awful place full of despair and hopelessness. Thank you for checking in with us last night, so we know you're still here. Are you safe still?

I want to reassure you there are good people in the world, even though you can't see it at the moment. There are good people here on the forums too who want to support you. I'm glad you have a dog, that's great.

I'm really hoping you will reach out again for professional support in terms of counselling. It's done me a lot of good and it's someone to listen to your concerns. It can take a while but it's worth persevering for.

Really hoping you are OK Alex.

In response to: Depressed

Unknown userMember04 May 2020, 9:34 am AEST

Re: Depressed

Hey @Alex32redden just wondering how you're travelling today after the weekend? ❤️

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.