Self-care - Why can it be so hard?

@Former-Member it's hard for me because I can't seem to find anything that works and any enjoyment

I think it important to recognise that self care is not all about oneself. Part of it encompasses being part of community. Using some examples from my toolkit - knitting can include making

things for others, meeting someone for coffee might mean extending the hand of friendship to someone who needs a friend, gardening might result in an abundance of vegetables or flowers that can be shared ...

I added some new Birds to my Self-Care Toolkit @Former-Member @Shaz51

That was all I could manage (or come up with), at the moment.

The 2 new Fischer's Lovebirds are very brightly coloured & cheerful (so far not too noisy).

I will have to put a new nestbox in for them - the Budgies chewed the other box to pieces.

Adge

how lovely @Adge

@Former-Member, @Former-Member , @Former-Member , @Tay

think my self care list is including some more gardening and growing plants

Hey @Former-Member that's a great point that part of self-care is feeling connected to community, and giving to or thinking of others can create a sense of wellbeing and belonging.

@Adge love the sound of your new lovebirds, it would be great to see some pictures

@Shaz51 great to hear you're growing things 🌿

My self-care today is joining an online zumba class for the first time

How about you @Former-Member and @Tay and others?

Community is only part of the equation @Former-Member .

I think that too often we neglect the basics and rather look for something that gives us immediate pleasure which may not be healthy.

Simple examples include I know that if I don't give my body appropriate nutrition I do not function so well, yet why oh why do I continue to chose the not so healthy but enjoyable option only to feel guilty later?

Why do I find it so hard to get off the couch and away from the computer and go out into the garden or walk the dog when I know it will do me the world of good both physically and mentally?

Why don't I offer a kind word or be grateful for something rather than wallowing in self pity?

Hence your question and the title of this discussion.

The basics can often seem like the hard yards and not the quick fix we are after. However, I have found if we plug away at them we will find that as a byproduct we are happier and the moments of joy are more frequent.

I have read most of the comments and sorry if I am wrong but are you all talking about self care as in doing something for yourself that you enjoy? When I think of self care I look at the basic things we need to do each day like eating, showering, taking meds and brushing my hair. All of which I am struggling with with, I have had a moment of enjoying myself yesterday but first time in a long time. Do I have this thread completely wrong?

@Former-Member @Former-Member @Shaz51 @Shaz51 @Former-Member @Escaped_Goat

@Former-Member

thank you for your message my friend

yes even the basic things I find hard to do and to keep

like needing to go to the doctor when we need to , sometimes we leave it to when we end up in ER

like me at the moment , i am having trouble doing my diabetes test each morning

also finding that i am not brushing my teeth in the mornings ( only at night )

I am making sure my family are taking their meds but forgetting about mine

@Former-Member, @Former-Member , @Adge , @Former-Member

@Former-Member

This discussion thread is on the carers side of the forum where we are less likely to struggle with personal hygiene issues but when our loved ones are unwell, taking care of our own well-being can be problematic. There is however a crossover as the 8 dimensions of wellness apply to all of us whether or not we have lived experience. The difference being the emotions we experience and the time caring takes when our loved ones are unwell as opposed to being the patient.

I am so sorry I didn't realise I was on the wrong side of the fourms. So sorry @Former-Member @Shaz51