FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

6,181 - 6,190 of 6,906

In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Oh hunny that would have been a very difficult day. I'm sorry 🤗

I can understand why you are feeling as you are. Here for you sweetheart ❤️

@Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Thanks hun. It was unexpected which made it worse. I didn't know she was going to be there.
i just want to curl up in a corner and never come out.
@Anastasia

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I hear you sweetie. Not a good day. Not what you want to have happen. I'm so sorry. Sitting in the corner with you beautiful girl ❤️

@Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

thanks for the company hun. It is truly needed right now. This is a moment that I cannot share with anyone irl. No one that knows me knows any of it. I am not sure how to deal with these feelings. Sitting with them is all I know to do. It's times like these that I need to use things in my tool box but it's times like these that I find the hardest to do anything.
@Anastasia

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I'm here for you hun. You've got this 💞

@Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

It's days like today that makes me feel like its not worth it. It makes me realise just how much power these men still have over me and I hate that so damn much.
@Anastasia

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I hate it too @Lee82

It's so cruel. I wish I had a magic wand ☹️

Hugs and hugs dear Mel xxxx

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I'm just so tired. Trying to act like everything is ok and that I'm ok is becoming harder and harder to do. My boys have even begun to notice my mood has been changing. I'm sorry hun I am just feeling sorry for myself a little tonight. I'm sure hearing me whine is not something you need at the moment.

@Anastasia

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

It's ok. You have reason to feel the way you are hun. You're not complaining x

@Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Do you have any plans for New Years hun? @Anastasia

6,181 - 6,190 of 6,906