Darkness

Thank you @Emelia8 and thank you for your very detailed update on your thread. I truly appreciate it. You are doing an amazing job babe never forget that. At the end of the day we are all human and make mistakes. It doesn't seem to have upset hubby too much so be kind to yourself as you have a hell of a lot going on. That is a lot of meds to keep track of so a mistake here and there is bound to happen. 99.9% of the time you are on point so don't sweat the .1%.
all the very best for tomorrow I will keep you in my thought hun. Stay positive babe. We are here for you. Lots of hugs coming your way ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Hey babe. You ok?
@Former-Member

Babe please talk to me.
@Former-Member I am worried.

Yeah I am fine babe, neighbour asked me to watch two of her grandchildren while she ran to the shop for a couple of things and they left with her within about 15 minutes and I thought that would be it, but no she came back and didn't leave till 8, I am not complaining because she is helping me get all my christmas presents done. I only came up from my paint room about an hour ago and am finally having some dinner, creamed rice. I would never ask you to stop drinking Mel, I know how hard things are for you, but I want you to be safe while doing it. Stopping something, stopping anything because someone has asked you to never really works anyway. When you fail as most people do when it's not their choice to stop, you then are consumed with guilt and shame because you feel like you have let the other person down. That is not a burden you need right now. Just please for the love of all things holy be safe.

New alters appear whenever they like, it would be kind of like if you where watching tv and really into the progarm and you know Mr9 is there, then next minute he is gone and Mr12 is there instead. the switch can be very noticable or not at all. How are you doing tonight my love? @Lee82

@Emelia8 , hello sweet thing I hope you are being gentle with yourself. I will be thinking of you tomorrow while you wait for the call. Sending you all my love

@outlander , I am sorry that the bump on your head is still causing you memory issues this long after it happened. I have bursitist in my knee and a possible tear in my Meniscus, so I have to have a ct scan or an MRI. Docotor said she would give me something to take before the MRI to help keep me calm but I don't know if I can do even then. I am going to post some pictures of how my day in my paint room went soon. Hope you can rest a little.

@Anastasia , I hope you are doing as ok as you can and that you are being kind to yourself. All your emotions are valid and worth expressing, I am sorry it hard for you right now.

@Schitzo , hoping your night has been an easy one my friend.

@NatureLover , where ever you are what ever you are doing and dealing with I hope it eases for you soon my beautiful friend. Missing you and hoping you are safe.

@Shaz51 , @Zoe7 , @Eve7 , @Snowie @Maggie @MDT @frog @Owlunar @Lostandalone @PeacefulWarrior @Eden1919 @The-red-centaur @Purplerain @mudsum @Sans911 I hope you all will find the peace you need to get some decent rest tonight. Nikki

Night sweet Nikki,

You have a heart of gold ❤️💞❣️

@Former-Member

Night everyone I am off to bed 🌸

@Former-Member

Sorry hun I am a little paranoid and a lot jumpy and sensitive at the moment. That would have been nice having some company my love.
thank you so much for understanding babe abiut the drinking. I do promise it's under control and if it starts to get out of hand I will let you know. I just need something right now. I am trying to keep the monster away as best I can and so far so good.
Thank you for also explaining abiut the new alrers too. That was helofum.

i an not the best at sbe mowmnt. Sorry panix is coming

Good night @Anastasia , I hope you are able to get some decent sleep tonight.

So this is what a full day in my paint room looks like.

I am using this paint pouring to cover notebooks for friends and family. I will show you ones another time that some kids did for their teachers.

This was white or should I say dirt colour with a touch of white. It is going to be my coffee table in my paint room.

This is one of the many drink bottles I am doing for family resin with alcohol inks. See next photo for how that one turned out

😭😠😭😠😭😠😭

@Lee82 @Emelia8 @Schitzo @outlander

I am sorry that you are experiencing a panic attack right now my love. Take a moment and just get through it the best way you can. I hope I can be here for you when you have come back to us. I will stay here for a little bit meds are kicking in so I don't know how long I can stay @Lee82

@Former-Member

Good morning friends, I hope you all have had a restful night and if you didn't I truly hope it wasn't too bad you. I have been awake for 3 hours already and it's going to be a long day. Sending you all love light and joy to help you get through your day and huge huges if that helps.

I am really enjoying this song right now, I hope you do as well.

@Zoe7 @Lee82 @Anastasia @Emelia8 @Schitzo @Sans911 @outlander @NatureLover @Bunniekins @Shaz51 @Maggie @Eve7

@Lee82 , I hope you made it through the night without the monster or at least it not being too bad. Hope to hear from you soon. Love you heaps and then some more Nikki

https://youtu.be/O3VPs9b_HZE