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Darkness

Unknown userMember23 Apr 2020, 7:03 pm AEST

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

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In response to: Darkness

Zoe7Senior Contributor30 Sept 2020, 3:25 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

I do not think you are insane and living on a parallel planet @Anastasia You care and worry about your boy and that is a clear sign of a caring Mum who only wants the best for her child. Life is just not fair sometimes Hon but you can only do what you can do and the rest has to be up to your son. I hope he reaches out for support if he needs it and that he realises how much love and support you give him whilst he is at his Dad's. Whatever happens you have (and are) doing the absolute best you can so now is the time for plenty of self-care to make sure you too are okay

In response to: Re: Darkness

AnastasiaSenior Contributor30 Sept 2020, 3:27 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

Thank you @Zoe7

He won't even be here for the roast dinner, can't stop crying, not fair 😞

In response to: Re: Darkness

Zoe7Senior Contributor30 Sept 2020, 3:28 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

What time is dinner @Anastasia I will share a virtual roast with you if you like Hon

In response to: Re: Darkness

AnastasiaSenior Contributor30 Sept 2020, 3:32 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

You are such a beautiful soul @Zoe7

Probably 630pm now, I will take some photos for you xoxo

Thank you for your kindness. I am going to log off because I need to pull myself together for when my older boy gets home xox

In response to: Re: Darkness

Zoe7Senior Contributor30 Sept 2020, 3:35 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

I will be here for you at 6.30 then Hon and will look forward to seeing the photos.

You can do this @Anastasia Enjoy the time with your older boy - some quality time with him may actually help ...I certainly hope so. Hugs and hugs and hugs .... 'see' you at 6.30 😁💖

In response to: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor30 Sept 2020, 5:26 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

Oh @Anastasia I am so sorry to hear that hun. I didn't realise it was happening so quickly. I thought he was just thinking about it.
as hard as it is hun he has to make his own decisions and learn from them. We can only protect our kids for a short while and then we just need to have faith that they will make the right decisions and be strong enough to learn from the mistakes they make.
just remember we are always here for you to support you hun so you don't need to go through this on your own.
semding you all my love and lots of gentle hugs.
❤️💜💙💚🧡💛