Darkness

Yea I know hun but I still don't want to go. I am petrified.
how have you been today

@Fluttershy1

@Anastasia @Emelia8 @Former-Member @Lee82 - things are tough, I feel like I've failed everyone today....

I just can't keep myself as Jayde I've been very switchy. I've been disassociating a lot and several panic attacks. Nobody understands.....

I just can't come to the conclusion of just keeping myself in the present and calm.....

Im feeling numb and lost..

Currently crying.

I feel like my whole world is falling apart...

im safe.

Hey hun. I'm so sorry this has been yet another tough day for you. You must be mentally and physically exhausted. Are you under your blanket with teddy?
@Fluttershy1 perhaps listen to some music babe

@Lee82 ... I know you dont want to go into hospital, I know you're afraid to go, I know it puts strain on yourself and your Mum and kids. But I also know you are about as brave as anyone can be. And I am hopeful that the treatment will work for you. I have had EMDR ... I have to say it was pretty rugged and brings up so many emotions and physical feelings. But it was nowhere as bad for me as what the Prolonged Exposure Therapy was. And as it sounds like you will be doing it in a hospital environment, you will be in the best place to ensure your safety. When I did it, I was at home on my own (hubby was overseas). But my psychologist was in touch with me several times every day to monitor my mood and to keep checking on me. So its all pretty intense. But I think worth it in the end. It definitely takes away some of the emotions around individual traumatic events. Do you have any idea when you will be admitted to hospital to commence treatment? They may well advise you that the treatment can wear off over time and that you may need a 'top-up' at some stage.

@Former-Member @Fluttershy1 @Anastasia

Emelia 💕

I literally just got here to see how your day has been @Fluttershy1 ❤️

I understand hunny. I know that's not ideal cause I'm not in your real world but I hope it gives you some comfort knowing that. There are people who understand too in the real world, you will find them eventually. I'm sorry that your family don't ☹️ That makes it very difficult for you. Keeping in the present is the right path so my therapist tells me hun. You are such an amazing strong girl. I'm proud of you lovely ♥️

No sweetheart it's the same :pile_of_poo: everyday just with varied intensity daily. Twice now you have avoided my question though 🧐 but I will let it slide today. I have missed you as well today but I know to stay away better now and today has been one of those days. I am extremely worried about you Mel. Love you 3000 to infinity and beyond Always @Lee82

@Anastasia - I could literally scream right now, my mind is racing and the voices and loud and I'm back to disassociating....

I feel numb.

hid hid hid

@Lee82 🤗🤗🤗🤗♥️♥️♥️

I just googled the therapy @Lee82 and I can totally understand why you are scared. I'm sorry hun x

@Lee82 - can't think think think, Ned hid hid, voices loud loud I sori sori sori, feel lik I fail agan

It may be a few months before I can get in @Emelia8 I have to change my health insurance first then go on a waiting list. I have read a lot about the treatment and I am terrified I am going to come out worse then when I went in. I have a few suspensions I have suppressed a few memories and I am afraid this will help bring them to the surface and I am already trying to cope with enough trauma without adding more to the mix.
Do they kind of like hypnotise you? Is it like a question answer type thing or do you just sit there and talk about your trauma whilst they make to move your eye from side to side? I'm a little confused about it and a lot scared about it