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Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

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In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Missing my BFF....😔

@Former-Member

I hope you are ok my love.

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Lee82 How has your day been today? You've had home schooling? I hope your anxiety's been manageable...

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I have deleted this message three times, so I think I will settle for say hi and I hope you are all doing ok. @NatureLover @outlander @Zoe7 @Eve7 @Shaz51 @Maggie

Missing you to beautiful @Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Why have you deleted the message so many times babe. What are you wanting to tell us.
I am here to listen babe. I have been very worried about you but have stopped myself from posting my feelings.
@Former-Member

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness


@Former-Member wrote:

I have deleted this message three times, so I think I will settle for say hi and I hope you are all doing ok.


Oh dear...I assume it's been another extremely hard day, Nikki? 😞

@Former-Member Thinking of you lots and sending wishes for some healing...

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

My son has every Wednesday off during homeschooling so none of that today. I had my psychology appointment today. I am just feeling very defeated right now and extremely exhausted

how have you been babe?
@NatureLover

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Oh, that's good about the Wednesdays off 🙂 Not so good about the defeated and exhausted feeling, I am sorry to hear.

I'm mostly OK, thanks @Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

It's just stuff I can't say out loud anywhere I guess. Izzy is back though not overly active so this maybe my last post for a while if she decides to be present again. You guys have helped keep me relatively sane these long pass couple of months so thank you. Loved being part of this wonderful family and I will be back. 💜Nikki

@Lee82 , loving you always beautiful

@NatureLover @outlander @Snowie @Shaz51 @Emelia

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Take care of yourself @Former-Member 💜

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I will really miss you in your absence Nikki, its been a real pleasure getting to know you. Of course, it will be wonderful to see Izzy back though.

Awwww ... I have really mixed feelings now. But I guess I should look at things this way .... If you Nikki (the Protector) are no longer prominent (needed) then it must be a good sign that our Izzy is doing much better. I hope I'm right in thinking that.

So take a well earned break Nikki. As usual, you have done everything possible to keep your wards physically safe.

See you next time you visit. 💕 @Former-Member

Emelia 🌸

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