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Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

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In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Thank you @Emelia8 I really appreciate that.
what you up to today?
I really hope Izzy is ok. I am getting a little worried. I'm sorry I can't seem to control my emotions today.

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

💓 @Lee82

Nothing exciting happening here. Taking advantage of fine and partly sunny day to get couple of loads of washing done. It rained Fri, Sat and wet again tomorrow.

I might do some more of my diamond painting this arvo. I see you do DPs as well, and some lovely ones. 😀 Maybe we can both do some together today? I find the process very calming usually. Just have to get the anxiety under control enough that the shakes arent too bad. 😳

Em 🌸

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Lee82 no i dont mind you calling me that

im doing more research today because we are on severe weather alerts. we not long ao go alerts for 130k wind gusts, flood warnings and a chance some areas if they get like water spouts then they may come inland as mini tornados so am distracting myself from that as well as im safe from those but not floods.

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I would love to see a pic of your diamond painting @Emelia8

I don't think I can do any at the moment as I am shaking way too much. My anxiety is very heightened right now. If it settles down I would live to do some with you. I am having very strong SI atm.

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Oh my @outlander that is scary hun. I hope everything will be ok for you and that it passes you very soon. Happy to sit here with you until it is all over.

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

130km wind gusts, OMG @outlander ...and floods forecast where you are...I hope it won't be too bad...

@Emelia8 hoping your anxiety and shaking ease..

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@NatureLover ❤️

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness


@Lee82 wrote:

I don't think I can do any at the moment as I am shaking way too much.

...

I am having very strong SI atm.


Oh no, sorry to hear, @Lee82 😞

Here with you... ❤

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Thank you @NatureLover it doesn't help that I am home alone. I just want the pain to end.

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

thanks @Lee82 @NatureLover its a little nerve wracking, all i can think is im glad the horses are safe and were fed before all this rain come cause theres a chance i wont get there again till either monday arvo or tuesday depending on how much flooding is around on the roads.

getting abit overwhelmed with the research now. lactose seems to be in sooo many things, no wonder ive been so sick if im severly intolerant to it!
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