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Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

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In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Thanks again for being with me this morning @NatureLover I am not going to cope well with the med changes as I have trouble with side effects a lot. But no option if I want to stay at home. I am very angry at my lack of strength and ability to protect my Izzy right now. I am not use to being emotional or vulnerable and it's adding to the mess that is our head.

In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

💖💐 @Maggie 💐💖

💖☃️ @Snowie ☃️💖

In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

sending heaps of love @Former-Member im so sorry things are this tough right now 💜💜

you cant be strong all the time even as a protector. im glad youll have that extra night support as well. i hope the med changes arent too rough of you

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Former-Member sending you lots of love, hugs and strength hun 💜💜

In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I'm so sorry to hear that hospital was terrible hun. It is never fun when you go in for those types of reasons. I really do hope these new meds make all of the difference but I know it is going to be hell getting there. The side effects suck. I am going through them at the moment too. You didn't upset me gorgeous I was just very concerned and worried about you. I just need you to remember our promise. I know your feeling beaten and that you feel like you have failed Izzy but honey you need to see that that is far from the truth. You are strong and I know you can beat this. It's just an extremely long journey with a hell of a lot of bumps in the road. You have a lot of wonderful people around you for support as well as your family here on the forum please lean on them.
I love you unconditionally my BFF! 💗

@Former-Member

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness


@Former-Member wrote:

Thanks again for being with me this morning @NatureLover I am not going to cope well with the med changes as I have trouble with side effects a lot. But no option if I want to stay at home. I am very angry at my lack of strength and ability to protect my Izzy right now. I am not use to being emotional or vulnerable and it's adding to the mess that is our head.


Nikki I'm so sorry you feel angry at yourself, and emotional and vulnerable. I really hope those feelings ease soon, as I think you do an amazing job.

I can empathise with the med changes being awful...sending all my best wishes as you go through this...

@Former-Member

In response to: Re: Darkness

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@Former-Member Love you always ❤️

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Are you still awake my love? @Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

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I'm awake sorry my notifications didn't go off.
@Former-Member

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

That's ok honey, just wanted some company but ended up falling back to sleep myself. How are you today? @Lee82

Good morning 💖🌵 @NatureLover 🌵💖, I am sorry you don't do well with med changes either, it really is the pits. I hope you have an easy Thursday planned. Sending you huge hugs.

Good morning 💖👸 @Bunniekins 👸💖 I hope my beautiful pea has a wonderfully peaceful day ahead.

Good morning 💖👩🏼‍🏫 @Zoe7 👩🏼‍🏫💖 Happy Thursday my friend. I hope all your classes go smoothly and you enjoy your day.

Good morning 💖🦖 @outlander 🦖💖 sending you all my love and hope that you are doing ok today.

Good morning 💖☃️ @Snowie ☃️💖 Hoping you can find sunshine and moments of joy today.

Good morning 💖🦋 @Eve7 🦋💖 I will be thinking of you lots today as you make your way home. I hope you are ok and the transition to being in your own space with your things isn't to rough and you find small blessing in today. Sending you huge hugs

Good morning 💖🐥 @Maggie 🐥💖 sending you loving wishes that you find light and love in your day.

Good morning 💖💐 @Shaz51 💐💖 wishing you and Mr Shaz a quite and gentle day.

Good morning 💖🚘 @Sans911 🚘💖 hoping whatever you have planned today goes as you planned and that your work with your Mentee's fills your bucket with joy and pride.

Also good morning to anyone I missed and anyone passing through. 💜Nikki

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