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Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

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In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@outlander 💜💜💜

@Zoe7 💖💖💖

Mel, I hope you are ok. Love you always 💝💝💝

@Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Good morning forum family, I hope everyone got a little rest last night. It's raining here in Sunny Queensland perfect for a day of nothing. I maybe repeating myself, so sorry if I am short term memory is a bit of a problem lately. I am struggling to be anywhere including here, despair and depression is really got a hold of me right now. I am mindful of the fact that when Izzy was too emotional and on here she was saying stuff that wasn't appropriate so I don't trust myself not to do the same thing. I am missing you guys a lot and feeling very lonely but I just don't have the energy or the will really. I have had 2, 45 minutes naps since 12:30 am Friday morning and sleep just doesn't want to take me. Sh is out of control again and lack of desire to eat is becoming a problem.

You know how I told you guys that I was worried if I told anyone about seeing my dad and step mum it won't end up happening. Well the day after I told you my dad was rushed to hospital and is still there. He is not a well man😞 I can't visit him because hospitals are a major trigger for Izzy so everything crossed he comes home soon.

I will follow along via emails notifications and try to be conscious to check in at least once a day for those of you that want me too. I hope your Saturday is a peaceful day for you all. 💜Nikki

Mel, missing you especially. Sending you all my love and some very special Kimmy hugs. Love you beautiful @Lee82

@outlander @Zoe7 @NatureLover @Eve7 @Shaz51 @Sans911 @Snowie @Maggie

Miss chatting to you @Appleblossom 💐💐💐

Missing you heaps Sherry 💖🐶

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

sending tender hugs my @Former-Member

here for you my friend xx

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It all sounds really hard @Former-Member . Sending 💞💞💞

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness


@Former-Member wrote:

I am struggling to be anywhere including here, despair and depression is really got a hold of me right now.


Sorry things are so awful at the moment, Nikki, and the lack of sleep is so bad. 😞 Also that your dad is in hospital... When were you due to visit him and your stepmum? Before he went into hospital, I mean...

Sending a gentle hug...hoping that you feel like eating soon, and that the depression eases. ❤️ @Former-Member

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Sorry to hear you are going through a really rough time @Former-Member We're all sitting here with you so keep checking in with us when you feel up to it

In response to: Re: Darkness

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Thank you so much for checking in Nikki @Former-Member Itdoes seem that life is really tough for you but you have our support here when you can be here ...and also when you can't. Do what you need to keep safe and get through Hon - we will be thinking of you whether you are here or not. Hugs snd hugs and hugs to you

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Thanks for checking in Mel. Sending lots and lots of hugs my love. 💝🌸 @Lee82 🌸💝

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Former-Member, hugs

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Former-Member
you can talk here anytime, youve come a long way with learning about the guidelines. please dont hide away out of that fear. i know youll be mindful with your posts
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