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Something’s not right

Darkness

Unknown userMember23 Apr 2020, 7:03 pm AEST

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

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In response to: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor15 June 2020, 6:37 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

Thank you so much for checking in babe. I really appreciate it. Please don't worry about being here to support us hun I only wish there was more I could do for you. Please just keep yourself safe and look after you as best you can because you mean the world to me gorgeous and I don't know what I would do without you around.
just know that I will be here if you need to chat always.
love you to infinity and beyond, always and forever, to the moon and back and unconditionally

will be thinking of you hun.
please take care.

@Former-Member

In response to: Darkness

NatureLoverSenior Contributor15 June 2020, 6:59 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

@Former-Member have been thinking about you and worrying about you. Thanks for updating us. Really, really hoping things turn a corner for the better for you very soon. No need to reply at all. Sending a gentle soft hug, if that's OK... ❤

In response to: Re: Darkness

Unknown userMember16 June 2020, 4:31 am AEST

Re: Darkness

Sending you all my love @Lee82 Nikki

In response to: Re: Darkness

Unknown userMember16 June 2020, 4:51 am AEST

Re: Darkness

I had the grand plan of getting to everyone on their threads and posting a good morning, I have done a few but now I am exhuasted. Sorry for not getting to your personally @NatureLover , @Zoe7 @mudsum @SpiderLady @Eden1919 @The-red-centaur @Shaz51 ( have been having trouble tagging you lately Shaz) @Sans911 @Appleblossom

Hope everyone has a good day Nikki

In response to: Re: Darkness

The-red-centaurSenior Contributor16 June 2020, 5:02 am AEST

Re: Darkness

@Former-Member good mornin

In response to: Re: Darkness

Unknown userMember16 June 2020, 6:53 am AEST

Re: Darkness

I know I can't rescue you, but how sometimes I want too. Rescuing you really doesn't help you heal and I say that from experience. Sean rescued Izzy time and time again and the trauma always came back. So as much as I know that you have to rescue yourself, I will always want too and will always be here as much as I can. 💜Nikki

https://youtu.be/MgkNB4939YM

@Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

NatureLoverSenior Contributor16 June 2020, 7:28 am AEST

Re: Darkness

@Former-Member wrote:
I had the grand plan of getting to everyone on their threads and posting a good morning, I have done a few but now I am exhuasted. ... Hope everyone has a good day Nikki

Thank you Nikki, that's so sweet, you're a beautiful person. Am hoping your day is better than yesterday...I wish each day would get a bit better. I know it's not happening at the moment, but it can't hurt to hope for you... @Former-Member

In response to: Re: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor16 June 2020, 8:03 am AEST

Re: Darkness

Good morning Nikki! Thank you so much much for beautiful post this morning. It was nice to wake up to hun. Just knowing that you are here is all I need right now. How are you doing this morning?

@Former-Member

love you always and forever! 💗

In response to: Re: Darkness

Unknown userMember16 June 2020, 9:08 am AEST

Re: Darkness

A smile lights this very worry worn and exhausted face when we see "Lee82 mentioned you". I am already completely hyped up with anxiety this morning. Sean has a two day course and though it's online he can't look out for me so we have arranged for friends to be here today and tomorrow I have back to back Telehealth appointment in the morning so it's will be just a couple of hours unsupervised in the afternoon. When he has a break I have asked him to call the gp in regards to hospitalisation as I just can't keep doing this. 😞

I would love to know how your are doing my beautiful friend @Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor16 June 2020, 12:57 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

Hey gorgeous. I am so proud of you for considering hospital again. I think it is a good decision to have made. You need extra help and support babe right now and I know it will be triggering for you but I hope after a couple days inside you will see that all is ok and you will start to heal and feel better. I love you unconditionally and although I will miss seeing you on here everyday I know that you will be well looked after in there and safe and be getting all the support you need and when you get back home I will be here waiting for you. I hope you are doing ok today babe. Thinking of you always. 💗

@Former-Member

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Aboriginal flag

Torres Strait Islander flag

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.