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I am so happy to be here with people who can understand. I have had anxiety disorder and depression for 29 years and the first I was aware that something was wrong was the day of my first panic attack which led to Agorophobia within two weeks. I was working at the time and was unable to work for 18 months. I managed to return to a new job and worked for many years however I have never been able to live a normal life. I am on medication and have regular therapy, exercise regularly and try to eat a balanced healthy diet. Sixteen months ago I had a breakdown due to work pressures, ended up in hospital for a month and have not been able to work since. I have just been diagnosed with Burn out and was told that I may never get any better and would have to manage my mental illness. I am really struggling and feel completely worthless, most days I don't want to live, I feel as though I am just existing. I live alone and my adult daughters live a long distance from me. I would greatly appreciate any knowledge or assistance you can offer.
That is a very hard pace to be sitting in @sadpisces So many of us here have been in a similar situation so there is some understanding of where you are coming from. You seem to be doing the very best for yourself in the face of these feelings and the fact that you have had the courage to reach out here is so positive. Very much hearing you in what you are going through and here to listen.
In response to: Re: Burn out
sadpiscesContributor
Re: Burn out
Thank you @Zoe7. I appreciate your kindness and support.
In response to: Re: Burn out
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Re: Burn out
Not a worry at all @sadpisces It is really hard to not only be going through what you are but to be feeling all alone in that also - you are not alone here
I myself have been through so much of what you have - I am now back at work after nearly 3 years off. There were so any times I did not think I would make it through each day and life had no meaning - like you it was existing each day rather than actually living. I still have days like that and wonder what the point is but they are not consuming me everyday and there are a lot of positives. Some really wonderful people here held onto hope for me for a long time - as I had none for myself. Life is a little different now but I still have my bad days (and really bad days) and can function much better as a whole. There is hope - as much as it doesn't seem that now - but finding that path forward is exceptionally hard.
In response to: Re: Burn out
sadpiscesContributor
Re: Burn out
Oh @Zoe7, I am so glad you hve replied to me. I feel there is no way out and as I am 61 will never find another job. I am currently trying to undertake a Tafe course and even that is hard, I feel as though I have lost every ounce of intelligence and ability I ever had.
In response to: Re: Burn out
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Re: Burn out
That for me was part of the state I was in for a long time @sadpisces I couldn't think or concentrate on anything and it made each day so hard. I think it is great you are undertaking a TAFE course - don't be so hard on yourself though - it is more about the process than the end result and getting back into things that help you move forward. Those steps only need to be baby steps and each day you take one of those steps forward is a good day - recognising that for ourselves is important otherwise we would drown in the inevitability of what is to come the next day - and when the next day coes we deal with that in the moment. That is something I have come to realise much more than I did before - we can only do what we can do and take the wins when we can because they all add up.
In response to: Burn out
Bezak482Senior Contributor
Re: Burn out
Hi @sadpisces
Sounds like you are going through a tough time! Sorry to hear that. I hope this helps, I am just someone else on the forum who's had struggles.
I can relate as I have had mental illnesses that have disrupted my life majorly over the years, I've had two break downs/burnout plus depression, anxiety etc. I'm out of work at the moment as well but have enjoyed work in the past.
It sounds like you've achieved a lot despite anxiety and depression! You've had multiple jobs and have two kids which is something many people never achieve. With Mental Illness it's hard to maintain normal work so don't beat yourself up about being out of work.
When you feel up to it, if you want, you can do other things - non-paid work such as contributing on this forum (you've already made a start by posting this), volunteering etc. that can be equally as rewarding as paid work.
It's interesting how you said you're 'just existing'. I think everyone is 'just existing' - some people are arbitrarily more productive in an economic sense, but unfair to compare people who come from different backgrounds and have different handicaps. Economically, you could be considered very valuable in that you have two daughters and have worked for many years. Better to look at it as if we’re all ‘just existing‘ and making our way through the world as best we can.
Also - sounds like someone said you MAY never get better, doesn't sound 100% to me and possibly just one person's opinion.
It sounds like you're on the right track with exercise, therapy and diet so keep up the good work there. If you get along with your daughters I would give them a call now and then for a catch up on the phone, I hope they're a good support for you.
Cheers Bezak
In response to: Re: Burn out
sadpiscesContributor
Re: Burn out
Hi Bezak482,
Thank you for your kind and caring reply. I hope you are feeling well. It is so hard at the present, I just feel there is no point to my life. I really need to be working to support myself as I live alone. I can understand your situation also.
You are right I need to look at what I have been able to achieve, thank you.
I truly hope I can recover and return to work.
I appreciate your time and positive view
Kind regards
In response to: Re: Burn out
sadpiscesContributor
Re: Burn out
I can completely relate to being unable to concentrate, it's as though m brain is frozen. I will try to be a little kinder to myself. I find it difficult wording an intelligent reply, sorry.
In response to: Re: Burn out
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Re: Burn out
Just what you want to say is enough @sadpisces Communication is the key - it doesn't have to be what you may regard as 'intelligent' because whatever you have to say is enough. Here to listen.
As a side note - if you tag those you are responding to they will get a notification you have responded - that way we don't miss a response or post. To tag someone you type in the @symbol then type the name of the person you are responding to - as I have done with your name above. There should be a dropdown box once you begin typing the name that you can then select the member you are responding to - the name should then turn green.
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