Any diagnosed germophobes or hoarders on this forum?

@NatureLover yes sunshine in moderation is a lovely tonic but excessive heat I find draining. I have lots of boxes too and in the last couple of weeks have lined up more in my livingroom.

I won't say much about my trauma... it was ongoing but there were incidents I particularly remember. Perhaps being clearer about them allows me to process them.

Germophobia sounds very stressful. Does cleaning surfaces help? Just thinking of the electrician in the bathroom. You wouldn't want poor ventilation to bring a new set of problems. Quite a dilemma.

I struggle with religious belief (pro and con) and have never found a niche. Pax et Bonum is a Franciscan greeting and farewell but perhaps a nice sentiment in itself... Peace and All Good... very much needed in today's world.

Keep on keeping on my friend and best wishes with your endeavours.

Thanks for your reply and for sharing. Yes, heat differs to sunshine in its effects. Even a cold winter day with sunshine is better then a 35C day with no sunshine, just humidity and cloud cover.

I'm sorry all those boxes are piled up in your living room. There's pros and cons - mine are out of sight, but mostly that means I fail to deal with them. On the other hand I'm not overwhelmed by them on a daily basis, although I don't forget they're there.

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@Dimity wrote:

I won't say much about my trauma... it was ongoing but there were incidents I particularly remember. Perhaps being clearer about them allows me to process them.

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I am so very, very sorry about your past ongoing trauma 💔

I do feel that facing it allows us to process it and get some healing, but then I only have experience so far with emotional trauma and abuse. Maybe more will arise.

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@Dimity wrote:

I struggle with religious belief (pro and con) and have never found a niche. Pax et Bonum is a Franciscan greeting and farewell but perhaps a nice sentiment in itself... Peace and All Good... very much needed in today's world.

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Thanks for explaining ❤️

I didn't actually think about the effects of poor ventilation due to my broken shower fan. As for cleaning surfaces, there are no free surfaces to clean in general. I'm psyching myself up slowly to arrange an electrician but am not there yet. Yes, germophobia is incredibly stressful and your mind is never still, thinking about the history of what every single item has touched and where it falls into my 4 levels of "dirtiness" and all the efforts needed to disinfect and clean every item.

I'm having a bad morning - don't feel well, fragile and I had an upset with my boss this morning early on Facebook, where she got angry with me and told me off (rightfully so). I am trying to be brave and go into work anyway. I've promised myself that I will only do the basics and if I'm not coping I can ask to come home early.

How is your week looking? I hope you feel strong today and also have some hope and motivation... 🤞

@Dimity

Oh dear @NatureLover I hope your day improved. Did you work at all? I remember avoiding social media "friending" of work colleagues although I was later glad to stay in touch after retiring.

It does sound very difficult and distressing for you to have tradesmen and other visitors, now you've explained. You can't just disinfect surfaces afterwards and hope for the best.

Yes having boxes and stuff in view is depressing. I set aside some things for the opshop today and will try to keep going. I also picked up a bag of rubbish as I walked back from the postbox. Small steps. Tomorrow I have an MRI scan the osteopath recommended but I'm not expecting a definitive answer.

I trust tomorrow will be a better day for you. Maybe you'll be able to continue on from yesterday's efforts. Good luck.

Thanks, @Dimity. I made it into work and when I got there my boss had resolved the issue. She was kind and put her hand on my shoulder and asked me twice if I was OK. So I was able to stay for 4 hours then come home early. It occurred to me during the night that she may have resolved the issue by dropping me in it! But I will try to take the kinder view of her I think, and not bring it up.

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@Dimity wrote:

It does sound very difficult and distressing for you to have tradesmen and other visitors, now you've explained. You can't just disinfect surfaces afterwards and hope for the best.

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Thank you for listening and understanding ❤️

Well done on getting the stuff sorted for the opp shop, and for the rubbish picking-up.

I can empathise that having boxes (or in my case bags) constantly in view is depressing. Did you take the stuff for the opp shop from your boxes in the lounge-room? If so, I hope that helps when you look at them...

On days where rain is forecast for the afternoon, do you walk earlier in the afternoon / day?

Good luck with your MRI today. I hope you do get some answers that will help with treatment. 🤞

It sounds as though work can be a bit stressful sometimes, as well as busy... trying to stay on good terms with colleagues included @NatureLover . Glad it's worked out for now.

Most of the stuff I sorted actually came from the kitchen... so the boxes are still there. Maybe I'll tackle them tomorrow as it will be too wet for the garden. I find the forecasts too unreliable to plan my walks apart from checking the BOM radar.

Hopefully tomorrow I'll start catching up with things again. I seem to have let things slide for a few days.

Good luck with getting ready for your friend - it's something to look forward to.

Hi @Dimity , that's the thing - I would like to see her if we went out to a cafe, but not at all at home. It's just too stressful for me to enjoy her visit. However this is the friend who has helped me in the past with my hoarding, so it's hard to now tell her how much I hate having people in the house. My germophobia is just too strong 😢

How are you with having people in your house? Anyone at all, including tradesmen... It totally freaks me out. But thank you for your encouragement - I recognise it's very kind. I will try to adjust my thinking.

You're right, it's very wet today. At least we won't have to water the garden.

How did your MRI go yesterday? When do you get the results?

I woke up late and all groggy and am in a slump. Hopefully I'll come good later. I need to write and then post Christmas cards to relatives in England. Plus the library and the supermarket.

Hope you wake up feeling brighter. Good luck if you decide to tackle the boxes in your lounge-room today...

I'm sorry you dread visitors so much @NatureLover it must be very painful.

I'm a bit ashamed of my place and have self-sabotaged by storing some stuff I used to entertain with. I've sort of lost the plot. Occasionally (rarely) a family member comes over. And of course I had a weekly helper for a while.

Today I did a bit of weeding between showers, did some chores, and shopped. Not a lot but I had to push through tiredness and discomfort. The MRI results are due in a couple of days but I'll have to wait for an appointment.

I hope work is better tomorrow @NatureLover . I'll try to get back to finding stuff for the opshop.

You come across on the forums as so calm and wise, @Dimity ...I like that.

Well done for pushing through your discomfort and tiredness yesterday. Weeding, chores and shopping is not small. That's a good day of achievements.

Hating people coming in my house is painful and awkward - thanks. Of course, you had your helper come every week in your house. I'm sorry you feel you've lost the plot 😢🫂

This morning I scheduled a GP appt for scripts right before I'm due to take my shower for work. It's an experiment to avoid an extra shower...I will see if it overloads me. (I avoid showers when I'm just at home...it's a hangover from my 3 year nervous breakdown.)

I ended up coming good yesterday after a bad start - it's rare but nice when that happens.

I hope that your sorting for the opp shop goes well today. There's due to be clearing showers so your walk this afternoon / evening should be safe.

Yes I'm glad you came good yesterday @NatureLover .

I don't think I'll get to the opshop this week as I slept most of the day today. Tomorrow I get the MRI results and expect they're a waste of time and money - but maybe a negative result is still worth having.

I think I'm a bit like a washing machine... the outside might look calm but I might be churning inside.

There's a lot to unpack in our approaches to cleanliness and hygiene and I won't try. I mostly shower daily. I need to spring clean the house. I'm not sure if when or how I'll get on top of things and hit a point last week when it seemed possible. Maybe it still is.

Tomorrow we begin again.

You must have needed the sleep yesterday @Dimity . Or is it depression causing you to sleep?

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@Dimity wrote:

I'm not sure if when or how I'll get on top of things and hit a point last week when it seemed possible. Maybe it still is.

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I'm glad you had that burst of positivity last week to relieve the gloom. I hope you get some more bursts of positivity 🤞

What's your vision of "getting on top of things"? A clutter-free house with no boxes?

Yesterday I overloaded myself as I thought I might have! I won't try to schedule a GP appt on a work day again. I was too stressed after work to even do my daily laundry wash (I usually do one or two washes a day).

I now have a nice 3 days at home, unless any of my reserved books come in to the library today.

Yes, maybe a negative result on the MRI will still be helpful...I hope it goes OK, getting your results.