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There goes another dream.

LemonjuiceSenior Contributor30 Jan 2020, 3:05 pm AEDT

There goes another dream.

I was told by an academic a couple of years back that if I did a graduate diploma, I could move on to do a PhD. I started the course thinking the two year course would take me three part-time years. It's taken me six years due to ill health, deaths, etc, with three subjects left to complete. I was just told that this was wrong, and I still have to complete honours, then masters, etc, before getting to a PhD. I'm done. At 56, four to six years doing a PhD was ok, but now it's six before I even begin studying for a PhD, it's too much for me. I'm already slowing down mentally. So, the last reason to live is now past me. Oh well, add it to all the other things I screwed up.

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In response to: There goes another dream.

DimitySenior Contributor06 Feb 2020, 3:25 am AEDT

Re: There goes another dream.

Hi @soppykat

I wrote a long reply but there was an error and it didn't post.

I went through the revolving doors of admissions til in my 40s. At 37 you have the luxury of looking forward as well as back, and maybe strengthening your aims by also seeing what you'd like to avoid.

New starts are tempting but jobwise didn't always work for me. I worked hard but sometimes stuffed up badly and I don't know how I kept working.

My psychologist wanted me to list achievements that would make me feel good but personally I don't think a life is measured by buying a red car or going on an overseas trip. And comparing yourself with people free of MI doesn't make sense, though I guess they'd have their own problems. Sure I regret my lost studies but I regret lost friends and relationships more. I suspect holding onto some self respect despite stigma and depression is the key, but I don't have the answers to that yet.

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