I’m really sorry

I'm always listening

@BlueBay

Thanks @Owlunar ❤️❤️
I am seeing my psychologist tomorrow afternoon and after he seeing the exercise physiologist. I think I start the exercise group class next week but because I'm away I start the following week.
I'm going to have a lot to say to her.
do you know @Owlunar mum doesn't ring me as often anymore. She is been very strange. She also gets weird when hubby and I go away. It's like she's jealous. So now she waits for me to ring. I'm nit going to ring her everyday.
mmm self love I don't know.
it's a real struggle.

hi 👋 @Bunniekins @Shaz51 @outlander @Appleblossom @MDT @Gazza75 @Maggie @Zoe7 @Faith-and-Hope abd others I've forgotten

Thanks my awesome friend @MDT xx

Hi @BlueBay

I wish you the best with your appointments today - you do have a lot to talk about - I hope it all goes well - you are due for a good break

About your mother - I really hear you. I think she is still playing control games and can sense that you are improving and not playing now. Don't worry about her - easier said than done though - I had the same or similar with my mother and just gave myself freedom to keep away from her. I was better off that way and that is one way you can care for yourself.

I know it's a struggle but you can choose. You can play her games or not. It's better not to play - but yes - I do hear you.

They say life wasn't meant to be easy - I don't really agree with that but certainly - life wasn't meant to be as hard as it often is.

I will be thinking of you

Dec

Hi @Owlunar yeah you could be right. She is really weird. She rang about two weeks ago and left a msg which I didn't see until night when i went to bed. I called her in the morning and she went off. She said "I rang yesterday and left so many messages doesn't S (my dsughter) answer the phone." I said S was out most of the day. She then says "well I rang her mobile and it rang and rang I even left a message"

fir a start she didn't call my dsughter because she had no missed calls. She hasn't even got her number.
since then she hasn't called. She gets very funny when we go on holidays. Jealous. So since Tuesday my last call she hasn't called and won't.
I'm nit going g to call her either. I'm sick if her.
I'm angry tonight Dec. cooked eggs and bacon fir dinner. Cooked all the bacon. Hubby didn't want to eat as he was laying down with a sore back. But now he's eating abd cracks it because the bacon is cold and dry. Wtf!!!!

i walked off and said "next time everyone cook their own dinner "

I worked and then saw my psychologist then shopping fir dinner. No one else worries about dinner do they.
well I'm not cooking tomorrow night. I'm so over been used.
All my life people have used me. From a child to adulthood.

Hi @BlueBay

BlueBay wrote

I walked off and said "next time everyone cook their own dinner "

That is an excellent response. In the past I have said pretty much the same thing and I am pretty sure no one else thinks about dinner, Think about it - although you are being used you are pretty high-standard when it comes to the chores of with your family. And when you do put this into practise then tell them to do their own dishes too

And Huffnpuff not wanting to eat dinner because he wants to lie down with a bad back - his dinner could have been eaten lying down - I know I like eat lying down - wow - imo - people can eat the dinner someone else cooked or they can leave it - BUT COMPLAIN ABOUT IT!!!!!

No - that's not polite

Anyway - your mother - not pleasant. Ring her say on Tuesday morning at 10.00 am - make a note in your diary and don't ring her again until the next Tuesday.

I have an idea that you are really maturing fast - it comes across to me that this is true and truly we don't need our mothers anymore. Your mother has very controlling you and you have done well in the time I have known you. Three and a half years I think - you can be a family friend and a daughter - but on your terms - you have your own life and although it's an exhausting struggle you are getting there.

You wrote - "All my life people have used me" - there is no need to wait. You can stop that from happening today. You are a beautiful person with so much courage - you are also working through a mammoth MI. Just do what you feel is fair - otherwise - don't

I don't consider myself to be a selfish person but I do put myself first most of the time. I can sound as if it sef-serving but I believe - truly believe - that when we please ourselves first we are better people and can quickly find a place for ourselves and when we do whatever we do for other people we do it from love.

When we act from love it is far better than doing the same things so we don't feel guilty.

My ex-h's family had a motto - I love it - It is in Latin -

"Nils bastando carborundum" (Never let the ######## grind you under)

Sending my best experiences - I have so many - I wish I could pack them up and distribute them

Dec

Hi @Owlunar i can't see your reply. Not sure why??

I had to rewrite it @BlueBay - the problem - typing in the dark - I am a touch typist but still need to look at the keyboard from time to time

I'm sorry - my next job is getting up to turn it on

Dec