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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51 Hi Shaz51 son1 lives in Germany and yes the winters get down to -20 degrees at times so a big wooly scarf should be just the ticket although he is wandering arounding here in t shirt and shorts since he has been here ... he is darn used to the cold he probably walks around in same in Germany.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Bunniekins, @Shaz51, @CheerBear, @Exoplanet, @outlander, @frog and everyone,

GP, I only got the notification just about an hour ago for your message from last night about going out in the night that time, when there was luck that no trouble came of it. I missed the post when we were chatting last night. That was an amazing experience, so glad you came out of it safe. How was your morning walk?

CB, thinking of you today. How are you travelling? Here if you would like to an ear.

Exoplanet, it was great to see you here yesterday. Y'all come back now!

Hope the day is treating everyone well.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hello @Mazarita, @Bunniekins

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Shaz51, scotirish sister.

How is your day going?

I've just got back from my friend's place, coffee visit over a couple of hours. Always brightens my day to get out and see my friend.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita had such a great morning walk saying hellow to many people that I took my son again later on which he really enjoyed. Yes that was an interesting walk that one ... amazing I came out of it in one piece really . How has your day been? Are you still in your pjs (I am back in mine and had a cat nap this afternoon).or did you get to visit your dear friend?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

All dressed here, @Bunniekins. Dressed a bit warmly because all the glass doors are open and the overhead fan on full. It's not a hot day, gloriously mild and sunny out there, with a bit of a chill now that evening's coming. The reason for all the air flow in the flat is that C is cooking a roast lamb. This small flat fills up with the smell of any cooking that happens in the tiny kitchen (only one person can be in there at a time really). So every time cooking happens, we have to rug up, lol.

Makes me smile that you had such a lovely morning walk. It's great when the mood is such that people (including me) are friendly enough to say hello. The beach walks I take here are good that way sometimes.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hello my scotirish sister @Mazarita

we had afternoon tea with my mum , and I have her favourite dinner cooking in the oven

mum made her bacon bone soup with everything in it but she was not happy with it so I was going to enhance the flavour but she has thrown it out

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51, pity your mum threw out the soup, when you might have made it taste better. Your mum sounds like a really good cook, who has high standards. What's her favourite dinner?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Your mum sounds like a really good cook, who has high standards.-- sure has @Mazarita like her mum

What's her favourite dinner -- Zuccinni and carrot quinch and I make her homemade sausage rolls for her too

she lovedthe beef cassarole i made , so did mr shaz

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita If I lived closer to the beach I would go for beach walks. I love the smell and sound of the sea and the feel of sand on my feet. You are so lucky living so close to the beach everyone feels in a good mood whilst they are walking at a beach. There is something wild and carefree about it ...

I remember a young woman who I was talking with years ago now (I was manic at the time) said to me to say hi to everyone and if they didn't reply or were rude then to ignore it and not let it bother me. She was right and I try to do it but sometimes it is hard when when they are just wanting to make life miserable then I choose to ignore them.... which I do quite well

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