FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

5,551 - 5,560 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, I don't think you missed me by much last night. Fell into bed exhausted after continuing with the video work most of the day and night, on and off. Finishing off some projects I'd left hanging before leaving for holidays. Are you around at the moment? x

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good (early) morning everyone. This morning I am especially thinking of @CheerBear, who is away at the moment but may be reading, even if not able to respond.

CB, the light has barely appeared but I know morning is already here by the birds sounding with early morning brightness. Mainly two different species in a spirited, light duet. I imagine the chorus where you are might be much richer and fulsome. Sending love and good wishes for your replenishing time away.

@eth, looking forward to a proper real-time chat with you sometime. We almost got there the other day!

Also thinking of @Sophia1 in hospital. Sending calm, healing vibes for the best of all outcomes.

@Former-Member, thinking of you every day, Niqua. Sending strength and love in every way.

May all of us find today rewarding in smaller or bigger ways.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning everyone 😊 And a big hi @Mazarita who has given me lots of feel goods this morning with that post, thank you 😊. I woke thinking of forum people and have been sitting on a little deck waiting for the sun to wake up, wondering how you were getting on. I was posting a photo in the nest that I took and thought of you Maz, as your tag came through (timing!).

Love the way you write Mazarita and imagining you with your bird company. The sky here is amazing. We miss a lot of stars where we usually are. I can hear Magpies at the moment and a lot less cars than usual ☺.

Hoping the morning starts off well, or well enough, for everyone 💗

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear, oh yes, the stars when we are out of the city are wonderful! That was a great part of my trip away too - the sidetrip to the country and my oldest friend. Such silence at night as well, the sky like a magic twinkling carpet. Yay for being away from home for a while!

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

The sky is incredible @Mazarita!

I was a having a calm inside, peaceful, still moment by the river and my mind wandered to your trip away and your comments about the energy in the city being tricky. I really feel it also, but maybe haven't properly noticed until we've been away from it as it's my 'normal'. We need to do more of this I think.

Have you got anyh plans today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear, my friend is coming over in the afternoon to stay overnight as well. She is moving into her new place tomorrow! After all this time, it's a great thing that she will have a place to properly call home. It's going to be a big rise in standard of living for her too. It's worked out very well.

Aside from that, I am contemplating taking my first beach walk since I've been home from down south. Rain is forecast but it may stay away long enough for me to do it a bit later at low tide. If not today, hopefully very soon!

What are your plans for today? I am looking forward to seeing your photos in the nest. So funny that one of yours went into the ocean fully clothed!

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That is so great about your friend @Mazarita! From memory she won't be too far from you again? It's been such a big journey for her (and you) but its great to hear it's worked out ☺

Beach walk sounds great! I'm sure your beaches are a bit warmer than ours (it's so cold here!). Hope you enjoy it when you go.

After all of that with mine chasing a feather into the water, they left it in the car and it flew away anyway 😆 Today we are planning on spending the day by the river. We'll take food, games and river stuff. So looking forward to it and it's supposed to be a nice (mid 20's and sunshine) day.

Little feet up so I'm off. So, so nice to catch you this morning ❤

Hugs to any/all x

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Mazarita @CheerBear and anyone else passing today. Sorry to have missed you again Maz.

Yesterday afternoon I got to read my brother's statement for the AAT appeal (NDIS) and have been really rattled by the end of it since then. His last paragraph says that if my needs escalate he would have to consider placing me in an institution. A punch to the gut and a few cries since then. Better bloody hope my needs don't escalate. It really shows that bro and sil are unable to do more than they do already (which I'm eternally grateful for) but sil's mother is also coming to live here and she will need care too. So this is all the more reason I need NDIS supports.

I can't really think about anything else this morning but have a computer class I'll try to complete this afternoon as it's the last one for the term. God knows how I'll fit new info into my overwhelmed brain today.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, that would be very hard to read. And yet it may help your NDIS application. Perhaps your bro put it in there with that in mind too. Sending hugs and gentle good feelings your way. ox

Hi @Shaz51, I've been thinking of you with the cyclone travelling your way. How are you going? I hope everything is okay where you are. Sending lots of love and hugs, scotirish sister. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hello my sister @Mazarita

we are safe , cut off but ok , still raining so no work this week

how are you today xx

Mr shaz had 2 suncancer cut out yesterday , some were frezzed off and one was shaved to be tested, we did make it up and back from the city -- very heavy rain

5,551 - 5,560 of 27,230