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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth .....everything has got a bit scrambled. We have to separate out the issues and problem-solve ....

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I have faith in you @Faith-and-Hope

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

🤗💕 Thanks @eth .... I can only try ....

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita how has your day been? Are you starting to feel rested and settled in at home?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, was up until after 4 this morning working on video. Today I've slept a lot. Feral day really, though I have dressed very simply, washed, eaten, taken meds. Still working on the video stuff today. I've been away from it for a few weeks and feels good to be getting right back into it in a big way. It will wane and I'll become more balanced again, it's just one of my breakouts that happen every now and then. But I haven't hardly unpacked my case from Melbourne yet.

My dear friend is moving into her new place on Wednesday, the one she how has with her brother. Four bedrooms, a lot of space for them to be independent as they have previously been accustomed to. But they are the closest of the siblings too and saw each other a lot even when living separately. It's a very good outcome I think. My friend may be staying here tomorrow night and Tuesday night so as to be closer to the new place when her move starts happening. That means tomorrow I'll have to get a bit more organised in the flat, ready for her.

That's me at the moment. What a wonderful surprise to hear you may be spreading out with more space soon!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita great to catch you in real time at last! It's great to hear you are feeling inspired with your video. And really good news about your friend's new flat. 4br so it must be pretty spacious.

Not sure it will be all that soon that I spread out - when they first told me they said maybe not for a year or two but I know they've been having discussions about design for the renovations already. So it seems it may be sooner. It will be great to have more space and the rent should stay the same but there will be things to adjust to as well. Closer to the main street out the front so traffic, sirens at times, and drunks staggering past on weekends. The pitfalls of being on a main arterial road. I'm concerned that I might get hypervigilant again despite having the others close by. But overall it should be a good move. I'm very much looking forward to the kitchen in particular as you know I enjoy cooking when there are others to share with. Maybe I'll even be inspired to cook more for myself.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, sorry for the delay. I got up from the chair for a bit of a stretch and a wander. Yes, real time, or almost!

I understand your hesitations about being closer to the main road. I've found there's always something that is difficult wherever I live. There is an element of compromise with housing always for me. Here it's the jets flying low and close to where we live, as they come in to land a couple of suburbs away. And some other less troublesome things.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Delay here too @Mazarita as Mum rang. Heading off-line now coz I've been here for hours this afternoon/evening. Hope you get some rest tonight - enjoy the creative spark if you don't. Catch up more soon

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Glad to touch base with you close to real time, @eth. Hope you get good rest tonight too. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita wondering if you're around in the wee hours tonight?

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