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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good Morning Mazy @Mazarita , Claire @outlander , @Faith-and-Hope , @Shaz51 , @eth :), @Bunniekins :), @Former-Member 🙂 and Everyone passing by

I hope you flight went fine Mazy, none of those wind pocket things that make your stomach jump out & definately no shaking or trembling (I've been on a couple of planes way back when - it's not natural, none of it!) 🙂 Hug your Mum for me, I mean every Parent has their downfalls, but I do wish I could hug mine. & take in as much of that excitement as you can . . . & then take a little bit more for me! 😉 Miss you Mazy, proud of you

My beautiful cyber-grand girl Claire Thank-you for worrying, even though you know that's not what I want 😉 I think I'm still just settling from xmas, it was really quite huge for me, I've never fallen apart in the Center of my Universe before. But I am much better now, the nausea has stopped as have the cramps (I really think that was something I ate). I knew, when it happened, this was going to take some time - I don't think I ever really realize just how much of that time it will take.

A special Hello to Eth, GP& Mohill Hoping everyone gets to smile today 🙂

Niqua

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Cant talk to her @Bunniekins im an attention seeker to her and the family and even my psych said my entire family has switched off to my needs. They didn't care when they were living with me so i cant see it changing now..
Just nearly had another car accident trying to merge on the freeway and no one letting me in so had to squish between a truck and a car and the car basically side swiped me as i was getting on. Pops not happy with me as i got out of their way into the fast lane ( which the other cars couldve done ao i could get in) and took off so just got my ear talked off by pop and said something horrible after i said id rather a fine for doing 110 then to be hit and cause an accident. I cant win GP i will always be that looser of the family all i can do is try to better myself to my liking i suppose.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Former-Member I always love your posts Niqua they are so colourful! Hoping you have some peace of mind today and enjoy the cool and yet sunny weather 😄 xx

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I always worry about you @Former-Member 💕 im glad things have settled physically at least and while your adjusting from xmas and things are slowly being worked out ill come sit with you in a field of orange and yellow ( the pic on your notes thread)

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi to you too @Former-Member hope you continue to feel you are settling now.

@outlander sounds like you took the best evasive action you could on the freeway.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth i will never live that one down but all well i cant really change it now can i

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander what did you do on the freeway?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Bunniekins second post from the top ^^^

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander Sorry I missed that post ... well I think it is about time you got a bit more selfish and put your needs first as your family seem to be unable to.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yeh i guess so @Bunniekins they arent even aware im in therapy. The last they knew i was seeing the old one then didnt go back. I cant face to tell them because itll just cause another argument.
Thanks for listening .. 💖
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