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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Former-Member @Shaz51 @Former-Member@CheerBear@Appleblossom @outlander @Faith-and-Hope @Bunniekins and anyone else floating around this morning. I haven't been on other threads recently so please tag me if you want to chat elsewhere while @Mazarita is away.

@Mazarita I hope you had a smooth journey and a happy welcome with your Mum. Looking forward to the occasional chat, especially to hearing about your screening.

@Former-Member I hope your anger has settled down and that things have improved with hubby. You don't need all that on top of dealing with pain constantly.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Hi eth and good morning! I have been away alot too with my studies and my son hasnt been that great either If it is not one thing it is another ... have you been up to anything interesting?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander Hi outlander! How are you going this morning?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @eth @Bunniekins @Former-Member @Former-Member and everyone

@eth Mazy said that we could use here to chat so if your comfortable here you dont have to move 🙂
How are you?

@Bunniekins what are you studying now? Is it still psychology? I hope things settle in your household soon... how did you picnic go with tour daughter?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Oh snap @Bunniekins above msg

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Miss you already! @Former-Member Sorry to hear you had hubby problems divorced mine now we are best friends lol @Former-Member Hi Niqueeta1 hope you are doing well today @Shaz51 last but not least big hi to Shaz51 how you have a lovely day!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander o0o0o0o0o0o ... it is going to be hard outlander .... but that is a good thing was just looking at what was expected for next week. The ground was wet so we went to a cafe then I tried for the next day but I couldnt get her out of bed. She has depression and sometimes getting her out of bed is impossible.

Have you been sleeping more? (stupid question I know but i live in hope for you that you have had a decent nights sleep).

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Bunniekins @outlander good to see you both. Nothing exciting here yesterday - a quiet day at home which I was ready for after a busy week and a half with stuff on nearly every day. New dose of one of my meds seems to have lifted the depression a bit but I'm still only getting several short sleeps overnight. Hoping it starts to help with sleep too.

No real plans today except to do a few domestic chores. Sil's brother and mother will be staying over the weekend.

Sorry for the slow reply - new handbag purchased on-line was just delivered. Looks great.

Other than carer duties what do you both have on today?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

What are you studying @Bunniekins ? At least you went to a cafe im sure she enjoyed herself. I hope her depression improves soon or she accepts some help to get the ball rolling..
No sleep hasnt improved and with my pych sessions about to get harder and not being able to talk about how im coping ( see second last page of my thread) its going to be tricky esp with no sleep. I ran into a door yesterday because of sleep deprivation. Was in plain sight but didnt see it if that makes sense.


@eth a quiet day at home sounds good and i hope the meds help you with your entire wellbeing. A nice weekend planned
No real plans today. Work but only an hr or so take pop to an appt which im waiting for him now in the waitng room. And a few other little things..

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander Sweetheart you are gonna give out. Does your mum know how truly bad things are for you?

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