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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

This is the second time in two days our flow of conversations have been stopped or interrupted by moderator intervention, @eth. This time it's moderation. Last time it was inanely basic and generic bits of advice offered when we already were having a much more in depth discussion about matters. Yesterday's interuption was simply redundant for the most part, I think. Today's is overzealous in my view. Sorry, but I am peed off at moderators interrupting our discussions at the moment, for not very good reasons in my view.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Trying to remember it all @Mazarita WOW about the solo show. That in itself would bring up all sorts of feelings and anxieties.

Triggers for me can be : Mum! (last year a week with her by myself here pushed me into hypomania for about 3 months. Travel. Loss of sleep and anxiety peaks - with the latter the trigger can be instantaneous. It seems you have most of these things happening at the same time lately @Mazarita. At times like this I keep mood and sleep charts - they make it easier for me to monitor myself and adjust my self-management accordingly and also easier to report to Dr and therapists what is going on and form a strategy for what's unavoidable.

Hoping your psychiatrist can help with a plan and maybe you could see your psychologist too before you go - to discuss how you might manage the difficult parts of what you want to do.

I'm sure I said a lot more than this, but this is the gist of it.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth @Mazarita

I had the same message...I just put it down to my non techno skills..

are you able to go outside Mazarita....I dont want to come across as lame..

I just dont want you to be affected by strict guidelines....

I want you to remember how lovely you felt after the beach..the walk..the pool..

I get caught up in robotic people on the telephone...I find myself frequently asking to speak to someone else...am often having callbacks from managers...it is something that very much pees me off..

have to get off here..sciatic crap shouting at me...as if I had forgotten it was there!

think of me attempting to do more decluttering today....not happy...

am going to go outside and talk to the plants I think....if you listen carefully mazarita..you too if you are outside eth..you might hear me...if that is the case cover your ears when the blaspheming is apparent in relation to the decluttering...

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good on you, @eth. Yes, let's move it right along and drop the irritation. Thanks for recreating your post for me.

Yes, I am a bit concerned about myself coming up to this trip. The main thing I want to avoid is completely losing it with mum. I have verbally abused her in the past because she literally talks in a highly overwired way from the start of the day to end, right in my face, emotionally demanding all my attention and expecting particular emotional responses from me all the time. Extremely in your face and hard to handle. I can't even think my own thoughts when she is around a lot of the time. Then she gets hurt if I take too long to answer her, or don't respond how she wants me to, which then sends me into a further spiral.

My psychologist and I talked this through for most of the last session. I am not eligible to see her again until I get back from the trip.

Totally agree that there are many anxiety and hypomania triggers looming. I am feeling anxious about just about every detail of the trip at the moment.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Former-Member, thanks for your good thoughts about calming down re the moderation. I am already letting it drop.

Will think of you with your decluttering and may even hear you, as I do get those sorts of vibes sometimes. Will try to send you calming vibes too.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita I also asked if you have a back up plan? e.g. tell your Mum you can't come at this time because of health issues, without explaining them to her. Then go anyway but stay in a motel and attend your screening as planned. This may seem like dishonesty but you have to protect yourself. Hoping she doesn't already know the where and when of the show.

@Former-Member I'll be thinking of you too.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita your Mum and mine sound so similar!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I don't have a backup plan, @eth, except now that I think of it, I could probably stay at least one night with a friend. However their place is very chaotic too and I probably wouldn't get much quiet time there either. Hmmm. Motel is not an option. Need to go because mum is so excited about seeing me and having me stay at her place. I am committed really.

But I will talk to my psychiatrist too about whether my anti-depressant dose needs to be reduced to lower the risk of snapping and hypomania. That could work okay, except that I'll then be going through medication changes while I am down there.

I think mainly I'm just feeling very anxious and edgy this morning about it all this morning really, after the dream that got my stomach churning.

But will be thinking more about this as this quiet day progresses, and will try to meditate and think slowly on things to help myself sort out what's the best strategy for avoiding a nasty bipolar brain snap.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good plans @Mazarita. Even just having this conversation here will hopefully help. That was my intention. At least you are watching the potentials and aware of the issues. Will be sending you calming vibes today.

I need to go water the garden before it gets any hotter. Will check in with you later today.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I think this conversation has helped reveal just how anxious I am, @eth, and it's better to know rather than squash it down and then explode. Thanks for walking me through this agitating morning, friend. Hope you enjoy your day and catch you next time.

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