FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

3,931 - 3,940 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Teej A little bit of sillyness goes a long way. What did you get up to today? Did you find somewhere to store all those cans?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

No. Not yet @eth I’m kicking myself a bit. I managed the farmers market this morning and a few things in the garden and researching some stuff but not much else. I’m home alone though and feeling quite peaceful. I did go to the kitchen before to get stuck in but it was sooo hot. As soon as the sun is a little lower the kitchen might be manageable. My house has been hotter than outside all day still. I’m hanging for it t cool down soon.

What have you been up to today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Not a lot done here today @Teej. Long nap in the middle of the day and some cooking late afternoon. Spent some time reading Breath by Tim Winton. But I wasn't giving myself a hard time about lack of energy as I burned some up last night.

Hope your house cools soon and you feel more comfortable. Must be nice for you to be home alone sometimes given that you're still so busy parenting. May the peaceful feelings continue into the evening.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth.

When does your brother get back?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Monday night @Teej - 2 more days of solitude which I've enjoyed this time around. My anxiety didn't spike this time as I feared it might. Having the dog here has helped with that I'm sure.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That’s awesome @eth. I’m so glad you and dog have worked out as companions during this time. Sounds like a win win for short breaks. Enjoy for now the solitude, and then the company when they get back 💜🤗

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Heading off to watch Death in Paradise @Teej. Enjoy the peace and eventual cool of the evening.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Just after 4am, first light is coming soon. This is a very late 'hi' or a very early 'good morning' to everyone here. I'm on my second awakening for the night, reluctant to go back to bed, as often happens.

So I thought I'd share something with friends that I didn't get around to posting here yesterday. It's a knitting project that has just been completed. For anyone interested in this, the post, including photos and story about making it, is here.

Fond good wishes to everyone for the new day that is almost arrived.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita WOW!! That jumper looks fantastic. I'm sure C will love it. Well done you!

Good wishes back to you for today. We're having gentle rain on and off today and last night. The garden is just soaking it up.

Not sure what I'll do today. I was going to start with cleaning my floor but there's no point with a damp dog going in and out. There's lots of mulch on the garden and he tramps it everywhere when the weather's like this.

Good morning to anyone else around this morning @Teej @CheerBear @Shaz51 @Former-Member @outlander and all

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hello @eth

just spotted you there...

I need to get off of this computer husband hovering near office window...I can feel the intensity of the glare..

am going to try and do some decluttering...hilarious really..

so clothes first...

then stuff in linen cupboards which are overflowing..

trouble is cant carry too much weight or lift heavy things down...will be an interesting exercise...

I will probably just achieve another pile of mess in another place...

I am so happy that you are enjoying your new found dog friend...he is doing his job well....

keep on enjoying your space...you are progressing well my friend..

husband's son and wife visit turned out to be the other extreme...I broke down when she came in and sounded so concerned and caring....I didnt realise how much medication she is on.

so it was an afternoon of sharing aches pains disorders...though they still know nothing of my mental illness issues or my missing son...it will stay that way.

better get off of here now

quick hello @Mazarita @Teej hope that you are both looking after yourselves...teej you make me laugh.mazarita wanted to say how lovely the jumper looks...i love moss stitch...that stitch looks beautiful and the colour compliments the stitch...very talented...

I thought that if that lady did not mind helping you in the future...perhaps you could do the finishing whilst she is with you helping...you could then enjoy the company and feel that you have done all of the piece...just a thought

mohill

3,931 - 3,940 of 27,230