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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander Like I have been saying it is up to you but if it was me I would be going to the ed.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @eth, @Shaz51, @MoonGal, @Bunniekins, @outlander and @everyone,

@outlander, so sorry you are in such a tough state at the moment. I really know the feeling of doctors thinking you are alright because you look alright. It's so frustrating when we are not believed. Sending strong hopes that you will get some good sleep and, with the healing power of rest, the bad feelings will dissolve away.

I've woken with more hours sleep up my sleeve than I've had in recent nights. I have to be in the shower and ready to go for a specialist appointment this morning, not really early but much earlier than I'm used to. It involves about an hour of bus travel to get there and a hot walk up a hill. After that I am planning a visit to the local shopping centre to make a copy of a photograph of an ancestor, to send to my auntie. Then I will be going to the gym for signup and orientation.

I spoke yesterday to my friend who is now officially homeless. She's staying at her sister's small retirement flat because of being unable to secure a new rental flat before she had to leave her old place last Friday. She told me she's been crying at the drop of a hat, but that her sister is being very kind and taking good care of her. But she's extremely out of her comfort zone in lots of ways and her sister micromanages her to an excessive degree, she says. Meanwhile I am checking the realestate website throughout the day for her, but nothing suitable has arisen. She is on my mind a lot, even though the intense part of my assistance to her is over for now. My heart is heavy for her. Please, universe, send her a place of her own soon.

I'm glad to have some appointments outside of the flat today. These days of wanting to sleep all day have been hard going. When I get out and about, I sometimes find a good momentum which is energising in itself. If only I could keep it up. But sometimes is better than no times, so I'm glad to have some appointments today.

Hope there is a fresh feeling this morning for all and that the day unfolds well.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yesterday, I went out in the heat to my appointments and this is what happened:

  • the connecting bus didn't arrive when it was supposed to and it was making me late for specialist appt
  • rang the doctor's office from a bus stop and was told they'd booked me in wrong, had to reschedule
  • so back on the bus in the other direction to second planned activity, which worked okay
  • then third bus ride back to local shops to sign up for the gym
  • got up the stairs to the place, streaming with sweat from the heat, and there's no-one manning the counter
  • wouldn't be anyone there for a couple of hours so came home instead
  • when I got home, I realised that the cancelled activities meant I could have gone to art class
  • but forgot while I was near there, so too late.

Gotta laugh. Probably walked about 1.5km in the heat and humidity nonetheless. And even though I went out and struggled in the heat for almost nothing that actually came off, I was glad it all got me out of the flat anyway.

In the meantime, I've been having doubtful thoughts about the gym, for various practical reasons (mostly the expense). Am still mulling it over in my mind. Need to do something even if not gym, but can't think what else or how anything else would be much cheaper.

I'll work it out. Meanwhile, I hope everyone is sleeping peacefully as I write this, and awakes to fresh feelings in the morning.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Hi Mazarita so it was a 50/50 day 🙂 I like how positive you are about getting out of the house even though you were stuffed around as you say you got some exercise after all. Can you not go for a walk even around the block? I read somewhere that 10 mins a day walking was enough to get benefits.

I am losing my psychiatrist he is quitting private practise I am devestated! I probably wont say much today because I am so upset. He is such a great psychiatrist and a good man too.

Wishing you and @outlander@MoonGal@eth@Shaz51 all a lovely day today and hope that lots of kind things come your way xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @Bunniekins

Hugs on offer for the loss of psychiatrist. I know how hard that can be. Just as we were talking about him a couple of days ago too! I understand you might not feel like talking about it much just now. Take as long as you like to absorb the news. Here to chat about it whenever you feel it.

Thanks for the encouragement about yesterday. Sometimes I get into rhythms where I'm walking a fair bit on the beach. I do a stretch of beach down and back, about 2.5km. Beach is harder to walk on than a flat surface so, in my mind, there's extra points in that. But there's always leg pain involved in the walking, sometimes bad enough that I can't continue. Other physical issues intervene too. And then there are just a fair number of days still when I can't get myself going at all inside the flat, let alone out in the world.

But, yes, really, I could more regularly just go for a 1km walk around the block of the school I live near.

Hope some gentle kindness comes your way today too. x

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Thanks Mazarita 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, Niqua. I know you are still away at your centre but thought I'd write a message for whenever you get it. Maybe you have occasional moments to read the forum, if not respond. Or maybe you will get this when you get back. I wonder how you are going. Sending love, strength and support for the whirlwind it is being there. If instead you get this message when you get home, welcome back! It will be lovely to chat with you again more regularly. I miss you.

@Former-Member

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Mazarita @Bunniekins @outlander and anyone else here today.

Sorry to hear yesterday was so frustrating for you @Mazarita. I'm wondering if there's a hydrotherapy pool you can get to that has open to the public hours. It seems like swimming would be a good form of exercise for you with your feet and leg pain. When I can get there it works for me (neuroma in right foot). The absence of gravity and less weight bearing as a result makes it much more doable for me.

All strength for continued success with the new way of eating @Bunniekins. I feel for you with the loss of your psychiatrist. Even tho' we know they have their own lives it can feel like abandonment. Can they recommend someone else for you?

@outlander hoping you've managed to get some rest by now.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Hi eth and good morning 🙂

Dr G is looking at passing us onto new psychiatrists which are coming into the area where we live ... wont be the same tho and you are right they have their own lives but with the good ones you build such a great rapport that you feel loss more so ... and we have had some duds ... Dr G is outstanding. He is going to be a huge loss to our little family 😞

On a brighter note how are you today? I hope you are well and today is kind to you xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Bunniekins I really hope you find a good rapport with new psychiatrist. And that Dr G writes a comprehensive hand-over letter for you. I had to start with someone new when I relocated and it was really nerve wracking at first but she has turned out to be good for me and I'm now on a med regime that works better for me. I also have more dialogue with her than I had previously. The old one used to bulk bill me and the new one doesn't but she put her price down so I had less of a gap to pay (I'm on DSP) and when I reached the medicare threshold the rebate increased. Hoping you find someone who charges reasonably too.

I'm ok today, low energy but it doesn't really matter as I've no plans. Psychologist yesterday was a good session but I always feel pretty flat afterwards due to the heavy ground we cover. Yet again starting the EMDR has to be delayed because of the way the NDIS battle is affecting me. She wants me to be more stable when we start it.

Hoping your day is off to a good start.

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