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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth stupid NDIS is affecting so many people badly ... I have a theory that the beurocrats thought it up as not a way to help ppl but a way to save money by making it so hard to use. I know I find it very hard to navigate ... I will go and have a nana nap now. cya later eth xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Take care and sleep well @Bunniekins

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, good to see you.

Two of us with a no-plans day today. Sorry you are feeling flat. Do you look at activity plans on days like today? I will do that before too long. For some reason, I resist opening it on a lot of days. But when I do, it's almost 100% certain that I will do more than I otherwise would have. And that tends to make me feel better about myself.

Yesterday, I didn't experience huge frustration luckily. Saw the humour in it, and that it was good for me to be out even if with blocked plans. So somehow just 'went with the flow' and felt fairly cheerful about it.

I did a few sessions of hydrotherapy at the local pool a while back. The weirdest thing of all is there's a pool in this building. But I've become too self-conscious about being seen in swimmers (kick myself for feeling that way, but there it is). And, for some twisted reason, I find it even more daunting to be seen in the pool here when I run into the neighbours on a regular basis, than if I was at a swimming centre where I wouldn't know a soul.

I have endless excuses. The main problem is getting myself to do anything. I get these good intentions and then my ability to exercise my own will seems to just fail. I get overwhelmed with the feelings I am having in the moment and fail to follow through on things. It's for this reason, I am hesitant about plans and goals. As soon as I set them, I seem to sabotage them.

Anyway, enough of a rave. I wonder when we'll meet up for a chat in 'real time' here again. Hopefully soon.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita hope I haven't missed you. I hear you about appearing in swimmers. When I feel like that I have a swim shirt and long bike shorts that I wear.

Glad to hear you took yesterday's changes in good humour.

No I haven't been using an activity plan for ages. But I do make a list of jobs to do - just resist doing them on days like today. No excuses!

Just noticed you posted 2 hours ago so I probably have missed you. The notification just came through - seems to be a delay for some reason.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita I meant that I don't have any excuses.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I probably should buy some more swimmers, @eth. I could also go for a dip in the ocean then. On my walks I keep magining how lovely it would be to be in the water. And I love hearing when you've gone for a dip too.

I still haven't opened my activity plan yet today either. I have many excuses, lol!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita on Sunday it was 42 deg here. I actually dived in at the beach - the first time since I came here a year ago. Hard to believe it's been a year already.

For my birthday last year I lashed out and bought 'figure control' swimmers at DJs. They cost a bit more but have been well worth it in terms of self-consciousness.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, looks like we did just miss each other. I went for a nap after I didn't hear from you for a while. Just woken again. Nice going with the swimming and figure control bathers. 42 degrees is fierce. Was the water warm too?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hugs @Bunniekins for the loss of your psychiatrist

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello my scottish sister @Mazarita, how are you today

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