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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good Morning Mazy @Mazarita, Claire @outlander, @eth, @CheerBear, @Faith-and-Hope and Everyone

'Camping fittness' hey Mazy 🙂 I like the sound of that 😄 I'm sorry your Doctors disagree, I know you were already struggling a little with the new diagnosis. I'm glad to hear your not going to worry about it {because there's not much use} and will be very interested in hearing how your psycologist responds.

I've finished Season 1, Volume 2 of Outlander Claire 🙂 Whoa - raunchy, certainly touches on a few triggers - and yet, so far anyhow, the good guys are still winning 🙂 They've just left for France. Poor Jamie. I've always thought it was worse for boys. I do hope Randal is permanently squashed under the door, I think the actor plays his part well.

Well, ready or not I'll be off to the Center of my Universe tomorrow. My child's Grandmother, Aunt and Uncle {who I have not seen for 20 years or more}, from her Fathers side, will be coming for xmas day. My stomach's already churning. So, I suppose, let the blur begin.

For me I think xmas is a case of just do it and get it done.

Niqua.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sorry I dashed off mid-conversation @Mazarita. Hopefully you are sleeping by now. If not, I'll be here for a while.

Sending you strength for the Christmas crowd @Former-Member. I'm largely boycotting it this year - not sending presents or cards. We will have a bbq here on the day with sil's mother and her partner but that's all that are coming as far as I know. I'll just be making a salad and helping prep the rest.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello @eth

I want to come to your place for xmas - I'll set up in the back paddock & I won't bother anyone, I promise 😄 I think my head has been boycotting xmas {probably does every year}, I'm not at all prepared - I've got a shopping trolley full of socks to wrap, but that's it. Between my childs Grandmother and Aunty and their partners Mother - my inadequacy with cooking and food in general, is going to be so blatently obvious. I'm so not looking forward to it. I feel sorry for my child, all these kitchen savy people around . . . and then there's me. I'd have Ham and salad (plain salad), and that leg of Ham would be a big deal!

Love to you Eth

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

LOL to the sox @Former-Member! We have a nice spot under the avocado tree for you to camp if you make it! When it comes to lack of confidence in the kitchen I hear you. I google recipes, particularly on taste.com (coles have all their ingredients), and then follow them to the letter. Then I often have anxiety in process of making them, but if I stick to the recipe things usually turn out ok. Or do it the easy way - buy pre-made salads, cooked chook etc - and try not to take on board what others may think. As they say - those who matter won't mind and those who mind don't matter.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

afternoon everyone @Mazarita@eth@CheerBear@Faith-and-Hope@PeppiPatty@Appleblossom

@Former-Membergood to hear your liking outlander. lol is that all your up to. i wont say anymore as i know what happens. im trying to get season 3 somehow. hopefully you get season 2!

christmas is a blur for me too. im not very christmassy at all. a few yrs a go i would be watching xmas movies before december, baking xmassy treats colouring in. ive done none except put up the tree and watch the movies as they come on the tv unless im bored.

glad your doing ok though

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi Niqua, just wanted to sneak in here before I maybe get an earlier night tonight. To wish you the best on your trip. If there's reception there, maybe we'll still see you on the forum from time to time. Otherwise, hope you have a much better xmas than anticipated and a brilliant new year. Lots of love, Mazy @Former-Member

Hi everyone, logging off to try to sleep now. Hope your night is restful.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

My early night was restful only from about 9.30pm to 11.30pm, when I awoke from the heat. Sitting here after midnight now with the glass doors open to the night, overhead fan on full. Beads of sweat still won't dry. A heatwave in these parts.

My friend and I seem to have hit some kind of stride with the rental search. She's waiting to hear early this week about the one she really wants from Friday, and is on the list to be notified of inspections for others. I get the online applications ready for each one she's going to look at. Then, as soon as she has seen a place she wants to go for, the application can be submitted. She is very anxious still but is in a much more practical headspace about it in some ways than she was at the start of the process. Having said that, she has been having thoughts of suicide again. It's the strain of possibly being without a home as a woman in her middle 50s, with chronic health issues, very restricted mobility and limited income. Please let her be offered a suitable place before xmas. That would be such a wonderful gift.

Aside from that, I've been working on a new video over the weekend. Still quite a way to go on it. Glad to be back editing pictures and sound again. In fact I now have three projects that have arisen recently. I like it this way, feel lost when I don't have something on the go, as was the case for the last little while.

I wonder how silly season is treating everyone at this point. It feels pretty odd and a bit unpredictable to me at the moment. Haven't got my cards done yet, looks like they'll be late if they go out at all. As usual, looking forward to boxing day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @outlander, are you up for a chat?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi everyone.

@Mazarita I hope you got some more sleep. Another slow start to an empty day here. But I heard from my Darwin friend that she will be here for Wednesday or Thursday night. Looking forward to seeing her so much. We'll have a bbq with fish that night. We have a great friendship and used to camp and go to aboriginal community festivals together before I moved. Ironically she's a psych nurse!

Sounds like you have a good system with your friend's house hunt. Really hoping she has good news today.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I was up @Mazarita i havent slept
I was in one of those states where i was really tired but couldnt sleep...



Morning all ❤
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