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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth , thanks for tagging us CGs in Training...I also have agoraphobia and it's got worse during lockdown. I'm sorry your new psychologist cancelled and that you had a PTSD incident in the chemist. Good luck with your Public Housing Application...I know how horrible the application process is.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks a lot @NatureLover . Yes the housing app is rather harrowing. It's such a balance between proving how difficult things are at the same time as proving you will be able to manage to sustain a tenancy successfully (in my case with significant supports). The medical assessment yesterday was a pronounced example of this. As was my psychiatrist's support letter. After a year and a half process of jumping through hoops to get NDIS, I am finding this process really draining. Thanks for your reply.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

thinking of you @eth
sorry im a little short on words today but am reading and sending much love and hugs to you
❤💜

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thankyou @outlander Sending love and hugs right back to you xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth So sorry you are going through such a difficult time at the moment. I think a few days to yourself will be really good. Tension with family, especially living so closely, can be so triggering.

Sorry you psych cancelled. Even though it’s unavoidable, we still feel the effects. We prepare emotionally, it takes a lot of effort.

Sending some 💜💜💜, hoping you get some rest this afternoon.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Forgot to add the pic @eth 😩😩

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Maggie ... your pic just came through ... I know someone else who would love that picture. @Former-Member

EOR I hope your psych appointment went well this morning.

@eth ... gosh so much happening for you lately. I know that feeling, sadly. Please do not feel you have to support everyone here when you are not feeling up to it yourself. You support so many of us here already, and we know you will continue to do so, as and when you can. Meanwhile you need to concentrate on your own issues at hand. Work your way through them all, and tick them off your list. You'll get there. Sorry I have no wonderful words of wisdom, but my heart feels strongly for your situation. And I am thinking of you with affection and admiration for how well you cope with all that you need to in your daily life. You may sometimes feel you are not making headway ... but from what I know of you and your past ... I think you have made fantastic progress. Perhaps your new MH professionals in your team can help you to make further progess as well. Sometimes it takes a fresh set of eyes. Sometimes we need to step outside of our comfort zone, with tentative steps. But also knowing we can step back into safety if we need to. Slowly test ourselves in a safe manner. Keep up the good work. And I have to say that now that there are an additional 12 Guides on the books, it must take a lot of pressure of the original 7. I think thats a very good thing. So sit back when you need to, and dont ever feel bad for needing to do so.

Sherry 👍🌺

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks heaps @Maggie and @Former-Member for your very caring replies. I have to say I've just had a 'yarning up' zoom with a bunch of women from the disability alliance and I feel so much better. With the others gone too, I feel so much lighter. All necessary tasks can wait til at least tomorrow if not Monday. Hoping I'll still be feeling better tomorrow to do the Saturday Soiree - all welcome!! But will probably sleep in if anyone else wants to get it started.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Thank you so much for sharing!

You know what @eth ? Your honesty and true genuiness shines through your post. It's easy to post the best things happening in our lives, but sharing our challenges and weaknesses takes guts.

Humans are social beings. We thrive on connecting with people. If it means a social worker, then so be it. Sometimes, it's easier talking to someone who is not family. You know what's best for you @eth .

My support is with you.

hugs,

BPDSurvivor

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

💜 @eth

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