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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @CheerBear. Lovely to wake up to a message from you.

Such a relief that I'm not the only person who might wipe their sweaty face on the bottom of their dress at a meeting with a new person.

I dig your fruit trees!

Hugs straight back atcha, CB. May the day bring good things to you today.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita @PeppiPatty and others here today. Thinking of you all and following the chat. I agree about tiredness @PeppiPatty - I've been completely drained lately, especially today.

Today was the case conference in the morning where I found myself being quized by a lawyer for NDIS about clinical matters that should be answered by a clinical psychologist or psychiatrist. Luckily I had sil and bro with me and they bailed the lawyer up and told her to put her questions in writing. Nevertheless I was in tears several times in the hour-long teleconference. There will be another one in January where we will have a lawyer from legal aid on board. Hopefully that will take the pressure off me. But it's clear more assessments will have to be done. They want to know what bipolar causes and what cPTSD causes - I think it's impossible to separate them as they impact on each other. Enough said maybe - just saying it's been a harrowing and depressing day and I've been resting ever since but don't feel recovered from it.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Former-Member I'm jealous ... I'd love to be able to get away from it all like you do. thanks for your delightful accounts of your camping trips.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, angry on your behalf, indignant about the treatment you have received. What a gruelling, destructive process to put people with mental illness through. Hugs and much love to you. I applaud you for being willing to take it through to the end, regardless of difficulties. I admire your commitment to self-care and recovery.

Hi @PeppiPatty, @CheerBear, @Shaz51, @outlander, @Faith-and-Hope how are you today?

My friend and I saw a place she really really wants today. It really would be such a great place for her, in the same community she's lived in for 15 years, not far from us and her brother, who is her closest sibling. But there is competition for the place and, being on the disability pension, the landlord may question if she can pay the rent (which she can, and has a very solid rental history over all those years too). Less than three weeks from having to be out now. Good wishes, prayers, burning a candle, however it's done: all much appreciated towards my friend in need securing this place.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

afternoon everyone @Mazarita@eth@CheerBear@PeppiPatty@Shaz51@Former-Member

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Mazarita.

I hope your friend gets this place and that the landlord looks at her good rental history. Disability pension is actually a more reliably stable income in my opinion. I am sure your help means she is putting her best foot forward.

How was the rest of your day today?

Hi to you too @outlander

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello Mazy @Mazarita, Claire @outlander, @eth @CheerBear , @Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope , @PeppiPatty

I'm back home 🙂 to re-group for a couple of days and then head off to my Center. I tried to send you a message yesterday Claire but the signal went all kerfuffle on me and I had to give up. I do enjoy camping and I enjoy that I enjoy camping . . . that I have something I can do that picks me up 🙂 How's your neck and back today, I hope they've gotten better Loads of love to you

What a huge day you had Mazy! This must be a super-duper video project!!! I'm proud and kind of excited that you met this other artist and spent a whole 4 hours interacting with them 🙂 So you wiped your sweat with your dress, this is Australia - that's what women do here :D! All that cleaning you did, it's going to last longer than 4 hours, . . well and truly worth it!! To do all that and then go to another social visit afterwards . . . I think I'd collapse, well in my head anyhow, I think I'd have to blur - and it sounds a little like you did once you got home. I'm sorry it led to tears, but I think it was so worth it {you might just need January to get over it, that's all :D} Absolutely the best reason to celebrate 🙂 By the way just want you to know, I love your love

I totally agree with you PeppiPatty about getting more tired as you get older and particularly at this time of the year. I'm not to good with xmas, it's just too much for me; such a definite dead-line - everything has to be done by the 25th, and for a month before everything and everywhere gets ridiculously busy!! Plus it's this time of year the heat starts - I'm definitely not good with that!! So sorry to hear about your evening and Mr A. I'm an alcoholic, I know how awkward it is when someone offers me a drink of alcohol - it's worse when even after I tell them {I say 'I'm an alcoholic and I now choose not to drink}, they continue insisting, like they're trying to force it. It may be polite to offer, but it is not when someone insists. My last visit to my Center, my nieces Husband insisted, stating he was a self-diagnosed alcoholic; I told him I was diagnosed by Doctors, Psychiatrists, and asked him how many times had he been locked up for it . . . he shut up and left me alone. It's not like I woke up one day and decided I'd stop, I have to make that decision every moment of every day for the rest of my life, . . . and it's freaking hard - I can understand why it would make you feel like crying

Gentle hugs and sending you calming energy Eth I'm on the DSP, I don't remember having to go through what your going through. I went to Doctors for a couple of years, my Sister tried really hard to help me until I got to much for her {and wrecked the relationship with her}, and then I had a Skype interview {after my Sister was no longer helping} and I was approved, just when I had given up. Don't give up, you can not do what you can not do.

Your more than welcome to join me Shaz! I hope your feeling Ok, I was wondering if you might tag me in your thread, so I could read how things are going? Only if you want to. I got a picture of a Kingfisher while I was camping, not as good as the one you got of the fella sitting outside your kitchen window, but I was still thrilled to get it 🙂

Thinking of you Faith&Hope, hoping everything is being manageable for you. I think the last I read was that you were about to make another shift? I was wondering whether you might also tag me to your thread, so I could read how things are going? Again, only if you want to. I have a little trouble navigating this site, and sometimes I think it just goes to fast for me to keep up 😉

No problems with the Kooka song Cheerbear 🙂 Hope your doing well I think you were having some accommodation problems, I hope they've worked themselves out. I think I'm repeating myself here but, would you mind tagging me to your thread so I can read a little of whats happening? I absolutely recommend setting that tent up by the creek 😄

My bodies a bit sore and I'm exhausted, but it's a good thing, it's a good sore, a good exhausted 🙂 I am wondering what have I done telling my child I'll be up in a couple of days {silly season reasons}, but the car is basically packed now, I'm not unpacking it. I must remember to put in a couple of teaspoons, I had some really sweet cuppas and super strong coffees, due to only having dessert spoons 🙂 Make sure I take the torch with me, I had the torch's charger while camping, but no torch 😄 I also have to fit one of those pull along shopping trolleys as I have one full of xmas stuff to take - I think the only possible place will be the roof-rack.

You should have seen the critters when we got home, I'm not sure they really like camping, they all ran straight to the front door and waited for me to open it 🙂 When they got inside they all went to their favorite spots, dropped and almost instantly went to sleep - they're still sleeping 🙂 Camping for them means being stuck on the end of a chain or lead or being put in a cage. I can take the dogs for a walk, but the cat never took to a lead - he does mickey flips and always gets off, so he spends all his time in the cage {it's a good sized one about a meter x 1/2 I think, folds up, it's really neat + a smaller one for travelling in} I let him out for a very short time the first night, but there was a road very close, I'd say about 100 mts. The second night the young fella had quite the altercation with the old cat, as they were both in the large cage. Very disappointing, there were no injuries, it was all bluff and bluster, but I was really hoping they'd share it - looks like the little fella will have to stick to his chain 🙂 But it put me off letting the old cat out that night, just in case his nose was out of joint and he took off. The young fella was a bit uncomfortable the first day I think, because he wouldn't go to the toilet. He's never had to go on the end of a chain or lead before, maybe he thought he shouldn't. But this time, with the road so close, knowing he will take off, I couldn't let him off; and eventually on our afternoon walk he at least had a wee! I did let him off for a short time at night in the hope that he would go, but it wasn't until we went and sat in the creek and I let go of the lead so he could chase the rocks I threw into the water {he sticks his whole head under the water to look for them :D!} that he hopped out on the other side and finally relieved his bowel - he seemed much happier after that . . he even did the same thing at the end of the lead on the afternoon walk on the second day {Phew! - I think he's learning :)}

I had a bit of a re-think while I was there, which I feel is what I wanted to happen. This was camp number 3, after many, many years of not camping. Maybe finally I was actually able to think, instead of just panic, panic, panic. I've had this bee in my bonnet about escaping the heat of January and going somewhere else for it - but here I am at camp number 3 & I still haven't gotten past 2 days! A month is an impossible pressure to put on myself, and I wouldn't chain/cage the critters for that amount of time! I can not do what I can not do, and I should be the last person trying to force myself to do it!! I've set myself a new, more realistic, still 'out-there' goal . . . a week, that would be quite the achievement 🙂 Then I could look at my next camp adventure for a week, and so on.

Well, I think I've had a good rave. Thank you all for being there for me to rave to 🙂

Love to anyone that wants it

Niqua

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Will do @Former-Member .... it’s on Carers, and it’s long .....

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

wow @Former-Member that was a long post

all good about the posting.. i find alot of camping spots done have great reception

nope still not great, might be another gp job yet if i can get in there before xmas that is.

sounds like both you and your critters are exhausted but well worth it hey! and then off to your centre in a few days my goodness you are busy arent you! i know you enjoy your stay there too though so good on you 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, thanks for your good wishes.

Flat inspection has been the main event so far today for me. I only woke after midday, long, fairly solid sleep, after a big day yesterday. Within a couple of minutes of waking, friend was on the phone asking if I wanted to join her for the inspection. So got myself ready super fast and went to her place on the bus with a dash of walking. Talk talk talk about rentals, inspection, talk talk talk about the place. More walking back to the bus stop. Home and a bit of relaxing. Then here. I really feel for my friend. She is in the midst of this chaos personally. I get to come home in between times and chill out. Just as well though, I am feeling her feelings of instability when I'm with her. We also almost had a little car accident today, missed by inches. So, yes, glad to be home in the cool and relative peace.

Edit: hi @Former-Member, @outlander, everyone, sorry missed those latest posts while I was writing the one above. Will read now and respond.

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