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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Niqua, what an awesome post! I gotta go for a little while but will reply later. p.s. I love your love too. @Former-Member

Hi @Faith-and-Hope

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

👋 @Mazarita ..... I’m feeling better today .....

💜

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I hope you've gotta go to get the flat for your friend?!? Sending a Universe load of luck on that 🙂

@Mazarita

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Faith-and-Hope, wonderful to hear you have been feeling better. May more of that come your way.

Niqua, glad to hear you are home regrouping before the bigger trip. I had to go because C came home and we had an after-work chat. He's following our friend's housing journey step by step too, so needed to bring him up to speed on that. Then we had dinner, pies, lol. Friend will find out early next week if she's the chosen applicant. I dig that word 'kerfuffle'. So brilliant that you have built up your camping mojo over time.

Yes, this is a real life video collaboration, usually I do things over the net. It's a lot scarier but hopefully ultimately a lot more rewarding, especially if we become friends in the process. He is a good guy and gets on well with C too.

Xmas is not the best for me either if truth be told. Firstly I always do feel it as a 'silly season'. Everything seems to go a bit crazy until boxing day. And, as you say, the deadline, with cards, which I still haven't sent out yet. I have been pretty organised with the few gifts I like to buy for people, doing it online mostly. Haven't yet been to a xmas-affected shopping centre, thank goodness. But may need to do that next week.

Your words about alcoholism are so wise.

I wonder if we'll see a photo of a kingfisher here.

A week camping trip sounds like a good plan, 99.

More love as I'm heading towards Friday Feast, maybe see you there too. @Former-Member

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Dear @Former-Member

I just wrote a long message and lost it.........

But thank you for your wise mention of your journey of being an alcoholic. My husband and I are tearfully realising we don't want to see his best friend anymore.........

You make me feel cared for. Your story on your pets is cute and funny !

and I let go of the lead so he could chase the rocks I threw into the water {he sticks his whole head under the water to look for them !} that he hopped out on the other side and finally relieved his bowel - he seemed much happier after that . . he even did the same thing at the end of the lead on the afternoon walk on the second day {Phew! - I think he's learning }

and your cat double flipping ! tee hee hee !!

Is this my stuff or " Do you feel free when you go camping ?

Christmas is emotional for me...........

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm going to need to stop cleaning in the middle of cleaning the loungeroom but it will be finished by late tonight.......

groan.

Why oh why did I decide to clean everything? What is wrong with me??

@Mazarita it's so cool that your still here and conversing......

Thinking about you @Faith-and-Hope

@outlander @eth @Former-Member

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Dear @Mazarita

I'm reading the book of Luke for DEcember, it's my stuff I know but I'm praying for your friend. That she gets this home. HAveing family around is so needed ....if you get along with them.

I live over half an hour from my Mum. I don't think it's far away anough but usually it is......

Fortunately, because we live in Public housing, we are too embarrassing for her to visit.

(phew)

heres a yummy sundae for you for tonight to eat.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hello @PeppiPatty

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks for the sundae, @PeppiPatty. And thanks especially for giving your spiritual energy to the plight of my friend.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @CheerBear. Just got your 'likes'. I've been up all night, doing some video. Now enjoying the quiet cool dawn before it gets hotter here again today. How are you this morning?

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