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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @Mazarita and all who may be visiting here at the moment ☺ Plenty of birds out and about this morning and wishing I could bottle up the sound and share it here.

Sorry to hear that it wasn't the right place for your friend Mazarita. The shift in mood hopefully helped with any disappointment from yesterday. The whole housing thing is such a rollercoaster (usually, unless you're really right place right time/lucky). It's enough to test anyone I think.

Hope the day ahead has some good in it for all ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @CheerBear. Good to see you have made it through another night without needing the emergency department for the virus-triggered asthma. I hope so much the lurgy has lifted for you and @eth this morning. Good to know too, CB, that you have put in place some extra support measures with people in your local community. That seems like a really good step!

I could almost hear the bird song at your place through your post. Quiet here at the moment, so far just one straggling bird a little while ago - that's from what I've noticed this morning, at least.

Busy day here for me today. Psychologist in the morning, art around lunchtime, possibly/probably another application to be done for friend after that. Wednesday's are a good day for me at the moment. It's my biggest day of the week for appointments and I feel more purposeful and satisfied with myself on this day than others for now.

I too am sending good wishes for the day to everyone reading.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Great to see you this morning @Mazarita ☺

Thanks. I too am thankful I made it through without needing any kind of medical anyone. I feel better with it being daylight now. The world always seems less scary with the sun up.

Those birds sound beautiful but they now sound like they've headed into the vegetable garden. They've demolished the strawberries and I can feel them eyeing off our tomatoes which will make me sad. Grrr! Still love them though ☺

Busy day for you! Busy is good sometimes and I can see how all of those things would have elements of possible feel goods about them. Hoping that's the case for you today.

Gotta beat big to the shower. Please say hi to the one random straggler bird from me 😊

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, just got a couple of 'likes' from you. I'm around too if you feel like chatting for a bit. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi and thanks for the well wishes @Faith-and-Hope @Mazarita @CheerBear @Former-Member @Appleblossom

Good morning to you all and @outlander

I love your camping and campfire stories @Former-Member Reminds me of adventures I used to have a lot of until my mid 40s or so. I do miss those days,

@Mazarita sorry to hear the flat was not ok for your friend. Hopefully something will turn up really soon. I was glad to hear she has temp accom back-up plan for if she needs it. Hoping today's plans work for you and the psychologist ap't is good and you make it to art class too. Sounds like a pretty positive day where you can replenish yourself before re-imersing yourself with your friend's search and packing.

@CheerBear really hoping your chest is starting to clear and you are breathing easier today.

Last week it got really scary for me too (fever, severe shortness of breath, wheezing and coughing) and I ended up on antibiotics and antihistamine which I'm nearly finished the course of. Still have a bit of a cough but I think it's starting to improve slightly. Have managed to get down to 1 1/2 ciggies yesterday and am aiming at only 1 today. Seeing my regular Dr on Monday for a thorough check-up on lungs and hoping upon hope it's not the E word or the big C.

So for now I'm using the 4 Ds when I get cravings - deep breath, drink water, delay, diversion - and am going to ring the Quit Line for some support I think. Talking about it here helps too. I hope no-one minds. I have also posted on the Quitting Smoking thread if anyone wants to comment there.

SNAP! @Mazarita

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, please do post about your journey with quitting smoking here. I'm hoping it might inspire me too. Wow, that's awesome that you got down to 1.5 yesterday. The four Ds sound like a good plan. Very best wishes on the checkup of the lungs.

In about 10 minutes from now I need to start getting ready to go out. I'll be skipping art class now as friend needs help with two applications today, so going over earlier. Yes, it is a relief that she has temporary backup accommodation. But, with her health, size and mobility issues, that is not a good option either. But better than being on the streets.

Do you have any plans for today aside from more recovery?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

You are such a good friend @Mazarita. No surprise that it's IRL as well as here. Your friend's situation really is a challenge and I'm impressed with your efforts on her behalf.

No real plans here for today. I imagine I'll do small chores on and off just to delay when I get cravings. I have a friend from Darwin visiting in less than 2 weeks, plus bro and sil are having a gathering next Monday for their birthdays so there's plenty of reason to clean up the cabin, particularly the outside. Get rid of cobwebs and clean glass (there's lots of it). I've been dodging cleaning the glass for months.

Hope your appointment is another good one. And that I catch you here later today.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks, @eth. Sounds like you have a good day planned. So good to meet up in real time this morning, even if only briefly. Hugs!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hugs to you too @Mazarita

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth ☺

Sorry to hear you've been scared by your chesty thing. It's not good to stuggle with breathing and it is scary. I take antihistamine every day during rhis time of the year and yesterday the GP suggested a nasal spray also as allergies aren't making things easier for me right now either. Good to hear you feel like you're starting to improve a little.

Amazing effort with the smoking. That's so impressive and a huge deal. I've been reading a little of that thread, but just quietly while I work stuff through myself. Cheering you on also. What you're doing is pretty inspiring and I hope you feel heaps better for it. Wishing you best for your appointment and will keep everything crossed for you.
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