FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

23,851 - 23,860 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Adge @eth good morning guys, hope your having a good day. yeah I've told my husband about it and my sister, she went through the same thing. the perpetrator has since passed away. I don't feel the need to tell anyone else about it. it's just a part of my life, that I have moved on from. it's made me very protective of children though. which I guess is a good thing to come out of a bad situation. enjoy your day guys. we're just kicking back watching movies for the day

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi everyone.

I've felt really ill today.

It started with a splitting headache early this morning - then I've felt nauseous for the rest of the day.

I shall see how I am for tomorrow (work).

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Adge I hope you're feeling better this morning, or can take the day off to recover. Sometimes our body is telling us what our mind needs ... time for some time out and for everything to slow down for a bit. Take care xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi and good morning all

@Adge @octavia @Maggie @Shaz51 @Snowie @Sans911 @CheerBear @Judi9877 @Owlunar @TAB @MDT @Appleblossom @Bunniekins @Molliex @outlander @Zoe7 @Teej @Faith-and-Hope @frog @Scarecrowe @Former-Member @Sophia1 @cutiepiekitty @BlueBay @saturnzoon @Maxi7 @Ant7 @The-red-centaur @eudemonism @Gazza75 @Exoplanet @-Liz- @Doglover @Bill16 @Bimby2 @utopia @oceangirl @Meowmy @Queenie @Angels333 and anyone I've missed - sorry if I have.

There's quite a few of you who I haven't seen around lately. I do hope you're ok and that life is going smoothly for you. And I am here to support those of you who are struggling at the moment. Tagging newcomers here too @Barenbroken2019 @soul11 @Lilaclady @Headaches @Handouch @Loreli @Fluttershyy @Phoenix80 @opinions2019dec @AndromedaSun11 @DesertRat @LA_ as you might not have seen this thread. It's a social place these days, but also ok to do a long rave about anything that's going on for you, and connect with some others who might have common ground with you. We're a supportive group here.

I've just had 3 days at home catching up on admin and domestics and also having time out. Watched quite a few eps of fave shows and also a new series called Dark Money (content warning csa) - which I was compelled to watch the whole series to see what the outcome was.

Was meant to have my 5th driving lesson this morning with the MH OT but they cancelled it because they have a sick horse. So that means no more lessons now until they come back from their shutdown period in February. I will need to do some practising with sil and bro in the meanwhile so I don't forget the progress I've made in the 4 lessons I've had. 6 more to go. My psychologist says it's good to have the break as it will reinforce the knowledge by graded exposure over a longer time.

So all I have on today is my water tai chi class and to pick up another Chrissy present from BigW and a couple of birthday cards for bro and sil - both have their birthdays this week.

Plus bro is due to get back from his o/s trip later this morning.

Then I'll be cooking for all of us tonight - a spring pasta dish with asparagus, peas and ricotta (vego).

Tomorrow is huge so not sure if I'll be around. Have psychologist, podiatrist and psychiatrist all on the one day.

Must sort out an application for a Companion Card today so I can ask the psychologist for a supporting report tomorrow. She said just to tell her what it needs to say and she'll write it. She's great like that. Hanging out to see her as she cancelled last week and we're part way through processing a particular event (DV assault) with EMDR. It would be great to complete that before the Chrissy break.

That's my rave for today.

Hoping to catch up with some of you here soon. Take care all xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth thank you for checking in! Have been spending the past two weeks in quite a pleasurable daze from these meds (just for short term) to help alleviate my agitation/anxiety I was having. Heading to a new psychiatrist today to commence a new medication plan so feeling a little nervous & anxious about it. Having slept and eaten so well lately I am scared I'm going to go into another spiral, and with chrissy/festive season coming up; not entirely sure how much of the "fun me" will be out to play.. My partner is also going away for 3 weeks next week so I may be in a little more contact seeking some support through this period whilst these meds stabilise...

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Handouch I'll be around til the 26th then away til the 8th. Good to hear you have had a peaceful time the last couple of weeks. Here's hope your new psychiatrist will be a good fit for you and that new meds will be effective and not have too long an adjustment period.

What a time for your partner to be away. Do you have others in your life that you can reach out to or hang out with in the interim? Otherwise we'll be here anyway and happy to share the support. Lots of people find this time of year a challenge and will be hanging out around the forums to get through.

Take care.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth @Mazarita @Handouch @Adge @octavia

It seems a lot of people are having breaks in their services for Christmas and January - what a time of year for everyone to be away - it can be fine for the individuals taking time but hard that so many of us are missing so much at the same time -

My GP is taking from Christmas until February - my pain specialist and psychologist are not back until the middle of January and my domestic help not on until the New Year and my regulars are not available for shopping - so I am just adding my lack of whatever until they come back to the list here and feel less alone - sigh - I take my holidays off season - it's easier that way - I am glad I don't have to take my time off when everyone else is - so there's the silver lining guys -

It's time for a rave - so I am raving right now - the supermarket was crazy last Friday - and in the car park it was sheer bedlam - what is wrong with people - Christmas is actually only one day but at this time of year people are having Christmas Parties and are they that much fun? Really?

Anyway - I am not alone - and actually looking forward to having a peaceful time alone but it is strange and often difficult that all our support people have time off at the same time

And hey Eth - how do you lose your driving lesson because they have a sick horse? Is that a typo or was that really the reason you missed your laslt driving lesson for the year?

All the best fellow travellers

Dec

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yes @Owlunar the horse down is the reason for the lesson being cancelled.

I know what it's like to have to plan shopping trips well in advance because of supports not being available - def worse at this time of year.

Bro just got back from his o/s trip so need to disappear.

@opinions2019dec I'll get back to you when I'm able to.

Take care.

23,851 - 23,860 of 27,230