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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita @Former-Member @outlander thanks for the tags. and @CheerBear and @Shaz51 too.

I've been down with a fever since wednesday and aching and extremely lethargic with it. My upper chest infection has moved down and is a lot worse. The doctor last night even mentioned that it sounds like bronchitis or emphysema. Hopefully not the latter. So now I'm on painkillers, antihistamine and antibiotics on top of my usual meds cocktail. Haven't got a lot to say, just wanted to reach out. My household chores grow around me but I'm not up to anything.

What a wake up call to try harder to smoke less and work towards giving up. I wish I felt strong to do this.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, just woke to your message. So sorry you've gone down with this. It sounds a lot like what I had some weeks back. Similar sounding chest infection that starts high in the chest and gets worse, as it seems to go to the lower lungs too. I have very similar feelings around giving up smoking, need to do it, feel I just can't. Maybe we can help each other give up at some future moment.

Household chores can wait when you are that sick. If it's anything like what I had, it would just flatten you. Your only job at the moment is to take care of yourself and get better. Drink lots of water! Hugs. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi everyone 🙂

Thank you for the lovely message that gave me a big smile @Mazarita. So sorry to hear you're feeling so unwell @eth. I've been fighting a bug thing this week and am feeling very knocked about today with it. I feel like I have nothing left in my tank and it's making everything feel harder than it needs to.

This happened in the sky this morning (while it was coffee o'clock in the early hours Maz), looking much brighter and prettier in person. Two times rainbow power, though it might be hard to see in the photo. I'll share it here with my hope the day has something good in it for you all.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @CheerBear You have just reminded me to put sky watching more on my radar.

I do earth and water a lot ... but there is always room for improvement.

@ethBummer about being sick ... on top of all the other stuff.

@outlander @Former-Member @Mazarita

I have had a weeks holiday from the IT world but am hooked back again.

Hope all is well in your worlds.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @CheerBear, thanks so much for the lovely image. Sorry that both you and @eth are struggling with lurgies at the moment. Hope you are both feeling a bit better this morning.

Good morning, @Appleblossom. Good on you for the week off from IT, glad you're back too.

Good morning, Niqua. Hope you wake today feeling refreshed after resting up a bit from your trip. @Former-Member

Good morning, @Shaz51, good to know you are preparing with written notes for your forthcoming medical appointment.

Good morning, @outlander, early morning hugs to you.

Good morning, @Faith-and-Hope, though we haven't caught up for a while, I appreciate your 'likes', reminding me of your kind presence around and about.

Good morning, @everyone. Sending wishes for good things in your day.

Postscript: well, I'm still up in this early morning. What time did I wake? Must have been about 4am. Good day yesterday after the usual slumped start. Ended up out on the beach for a good walk! That's the first in weeks. Was aweseome to be out there again, feet loving the water, though my legs struggled a fair bit with the walking, and I was streaming with sweat for quite a while at my friend's place afterwards. Worth the pain though. Today I may end up back at my friend's place again continuing with the property applications. It's getting hairy at this point but keeping fingers crossed something comes up for her very soon. Just a little postscript update on what's been happening over past day or so. Wonder what's been happening for everyone else.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Mazarita hugs to you and everyone too ❤


@Former-Member 💛💛

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander, do you have any plans today?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Trying to hide away from the world @Mazarita
I have my sisters for a while today between 10 and 3 so will have to find something to do with them. But other than that nothing much..

What about you

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'll be doing a bit of the hiding too, @outlander. Some part of my day always seems to involve that. Luckily, at least some days, I get out and do some things as well. If it doesn't pour raining as it's forecast to do, I may even end up out on the beach again today. Maybe help my friend at her place with rental housing applications. She's very close to having to move out of where she is but hasn't found a place yet...

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hiding is good but the beach sounds nice too @Mazarita i use to love walking on the beach but we are surrounded by dog beaches and im scared of dogs ao ot wrecks it.
Moving house is stressful esp when on a time limit, i hope your friend finds a house real soon.
Have the best day possible ❤
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