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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That shows Jelly cat has trust in your neighbour @Adge and super cute for her to be snuggling up to her 😺

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Wise words @Meowmy Harmonious sounds great (as a goal) - I love the thought of harmonious relations.

Yes my neighbour thought Jelly cat was being super cute too @Zoe7 She went all mushy, over Jelly cat's affectionate rubs.

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Actually @Adge Monday will be good. Hopefully it will be an easy day as am exhausted after being busy since Thursday. Was hoping for a rest after church today but a friend wanted to take me to her place about half an hour away for lunch. Went and came home even more exhausted, but enjoyed time with her 3 cats. Hoping I can sleep tonight as am totally exhausted and sore.

But Monday can be a problem if you have a job to go to. I used to do shiftwork so could be anywhere from 6am to 11 pm and any day. Health not good enough to work now though.I think that B is starting to help me mentally though, even after only 3 appts.Things are starting to sound ok from her. She is making sense when I work through what she has said even though it is very hard at the time.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Welcome home. Hope you get some r&r. 💕💜💕☕️☕️☕️

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks a lot @Maggie . Hope you are travelling ok too.

Good morning all @Zoe7 @Adge @cutiepiekitty @Bunniekins @Angels333 @CheerBear @Appleblossom @Faith-and-Hope @outlander @Shaz51 @Doglover @Former-Member @MDT @TAB @Gazza75 @saturnzoon @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @Owlunar @Meowmy @Exoplanet @Teej @Razzle @Maggie @utopia @oceangirl @eudemonism @Silenus @Jacques @Former-Member @Sophia1 @Hope4me @Dadcaringalone @Queenie @BryanaCamp @PeppiPatty @Bimby2 @Alone @Former-Member and hoping I haven't missed too many others. Really looking forward to catching up with you all and hoping things are going relatively smoothly for each of you.

Good morning also to @lostandbroken @Mange_N_Sane @Janet3 @Breeze @Stevo_2504 @MissMoo @LinuxUser @Dark_Olena @Tess58 @LadyCaroline and a big welcome to the forums. I've been away so hoping that by now you are all starting to find your way around the forums and have some supportive responses to your posts. Tagging you all here as this is sort of a social thread these days and also (as the name implies) it's a safe space to rave as much as you want to about whatever's going on for you. The people here are warm and friendly and really support one another. Just remember to @tag me (or anyone else you want to speak directly with) when you reply as I have my settings set to only notify me when I'm tagged. Looking forward to getting to know you all. You can also enter any topics you are interested in onto the search bar above and will see a list of related threads e.g. 'nervous breakdown', PTSD, bipolar, etc. So you can see other discussions on related topics with people with similar experiences.

I have an OT assessment starting at 10 for 3 hours today. It's specific to MH driver training. 2 hrs at home and then 1 hr on-road. Pretty anxious about it, especially the on-road part. I haven't driven alone for nearly 3 years and also the OT and the instructor are both male. Usually all my supports are female. My CoS woman is coming for at least some of it but I haven't heard from her yet this morning to clarify how long she will stay for. The only driving I have done since late 2016 has been with my brother a few times, always somewhere where there is no traffic. I have lots of questions and what ifs happening about the whole thing. Hoping they don't just expect me to get out the driveway here into the very busy inner city road that we live on. I can do all the mechanics of driving no problem, but have had blackouts doing 80 in traffic in the past as well as being side-swiped by a bus one time, and am really anxious about how my anxiety sometimes causes me to panic, dissociate, not see what's happening around me etc etc.

Wish me luck!!!

Will check back in here this afternoon. Hoping today is one of the better ones.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

My best;

Hope xo

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Maggie @cutiepiekitty @Adge @Zoe7 @MDT @eth @Molliex

@Bunniekins @Appleblossom @Shaz51 @Owlunar @outlander @CheerBear @Faith_Hope_Love

And to anyone I have missed, just wanted to wish you a happy Monday morning.

I'm going to the gym today with son 2 which will be good. I really think some opposite action is what I need.

After the Gym I pick up my Daughter from school early as she has exams, she was in tears last night worrying about the exam so I'm praying she does okay.

Then I have the rest of the day. I will get stuck into my DBT homework. My problematic behaviors have been tough to deal with so I have to be careful not to have unscheduled time instead I think I will slot in some time for tie dying practice for the big tie dye event I'm leading with over 40 kids next term. It always turns out well but I get so much anxiety leading up to it, it's like public speaking, the leader is in the spotlight, I love seeing the kids so excited but it's so stressful

Anyway sorry for the long rave lol

Sending Love to you all.

Angels333

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good Luck with the driving @eth thanks for tagging me

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @TAB and @Hope4me hope you're doing ok atm.

@Angels333 the tie-dying workshop sounds great. I'm sure the kids will love you. Good idea about keeping yourself occupied to avoid things you don't want to happen.

Take care all of you.

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