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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That is super cute @cutiepiekitty My little girl used to sleep with me before I got Toby. I didn't have him on the bed with me when he was a puppy but it didn't take me long to give in to his cute little face and pick him up. He can't jump onto the bed so I have to put him on there. If he jumps off chasing Cat he stays off though and they are the nights Cat occasionally makes it onto the bed to snuggle with me too ...love those nights.

What are you up to tonight? Just snuggling with your fur babies?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 just snuggling for now. It is a bit cool and bed is warm. Also tired from today. Just looking at posts from some music and other groups I am in. Might do a little bit of my diamond art or some crosswords later. Depends. But I might try for an early night in a couple hours (only 5:40 over here at the moment)

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yeah probably too early for sleep yet @cutiepiekitty I am planning on an early night too - hopefully before 9 so up for another hour or so. I have little left to do tonight so watching tv and relaxing. I give Cat and Toby their biscuits at 8pm then Toby goes out to the toilet and both of them snuggle in for the night. Going to do the washing up before I head to bed but everything else can wait.

Any plans for tomorrow?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 Tomorrow is washing day. Then if I can get the energy I will clear out a bit more. All depends on what the body and mind decide to let me do.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It is going to be 19 here tomorrow so would be a great washing day here too @cutiepiekitty Hope you get it all done and can find time to spoil yourself as well.

I need to clear up around here too but don't have the time until next holidays - will do a clean up of some of my cupboards then and try to sort out the garage. It is in a huge mess as I have been cutting the fence palings for the birdhouses for the kids at school inside the garage ...sawdust everywhere and over everything

Hope you have the energy to clear out a bit more - but if you don't it will still be there later

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That's the thing about work and cleaning @Zoe7 . If you do not do it then it waits for you. I have done quite a lot and want to get through it. But like everything it is slow. Might even try to go to the locale cafe just down the road for lunch if I'm up to it.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Zoe7

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Going out to the cafe would be lovely for you to do if you feel up to it @cutiepiekitty Just getting a little fresh air some days can help. I used to love going to the beach with Toby but haven't done that for a long time. Very much looking forward to the warmer weather here so can do that again.

I try to at least get the kitchen clean and the washing up done every night - makes it easier to manage and I feel better for it. The rest - as you say - can wait. My house is tidy but there is school stuff stacked and stored everywhere. Even the kitchen has things stored in it. The only room in the house that doesn't have something stored in it is the bathroom

Even the loungeroom has things in it now - my painiting and papier mache giraffe 'live' in the loungeroom - both I won't get to again until next holidays as well. Presently the things I need to iron live on the dining room table ...as does my school planning and marking ...easy to get to and do a little at a time with it all spread out and organised.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi Hon. How has your day been @Former-Member ?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7

Worked with a nice man then taught an exercise class at gym & another 2 ladies r joining my class .

I was relieved cause i thought gym might ax the class cause its very slow to take off cause its mostly for older women & theres loads less in gyms. But manager said its getting there we just have to keep persisting. So if theyre happy im happy. I was a bit worried end of last wk cause i just didnt know if itd pickup. Plays on my confidence even tho its got nothing to do with that rather just less in nos. Cause all the older women like it thats the main thing & r telling the manager.

So i felt confident enough then to take my class to a couple of retirement villages. They seemed interested also.

Also heard back from hall im hoping to rent. They said committee meet 10th sept so hopefully after that i can hire the hall & get enough people to teach from there. Fingers crossed.

Its getting a bit easier to sell myself.

Ill just go out on the days i feel strong i think.

Thanks for asking.

Its funny i moved to tville end march & im still wearing the same shorts & tshirt lol. No winter here. I like it here.

Glad i moved.

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